What is Pastafarianism? Pastafarianism: We have found the true God and want to talk about it

July 17th, 2013

The Church of the Flying One is officially registered in Russia pasta monster. The document establishing the religious group was received by Pastafarians in the administration of the Moscow district of Khoroshevo-Mnevniki on July 12, according to the organization’s official website.

“The Flying Spaghetti Monster showed us the way, and we followed it! According to federal law“On freedom of conscience and religious associations,” the Russian Pastafarian Church notified the local government body in Moscow about the creation of a religious group of the Russian Orthodox Church,” the group’s website says.

Now a group of the Russian Orthodox Church (Russian Pastafarian Church) intends to conduct “pasta services” and tell church followers about the affairs of the invisible and intangible creator of the Universe, the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

A certain Kama Pasta I became the patriarch of the church. According to Moscow News, the head of the Russian Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is a Moscow businessman who does not want to give his name and does not allow himself to be photographed. According to him, he and his like-minded people decided to create a Pastafarian religious group in order to test the parody faith “on our authorities.”

In the future, adherents of the cult of the Flying Spaghetti Monster intend to submit documents to register the church as a religious organization. If Pastafarians are allowed to do this, they will have the right to register as a legal entity.

How the international community of Pastafarians reacted to the news about the appearance of their representative office in Russia is not specified. ()

Let's find out where pasta actually comes from, i.e. feet... of this church:

Flying Spaghetti Monster(eng. Flying Spaghetti Monster) - the deity of a parody religion based Bobby Henderson in 2005 to protest the Kansas Department of Education's decision to introduce school course concept " Intelligent Design"as an alternative to evolutionary teaching. IN open letter on his website, Henderson proclaims belief in a supernatural Creator resembling pasta and meatballs - the Flying Spaghetti Monster - and calls for study Pastafarianism in schools, thereby using the argument reductio ad absurdum(reduction to absurdity) versus the doctrine of intelligent design.

Followers of the Flying Pasta Monster (FMP) call themselves Pastafarians (a play on words based on Rastafarianism and the Italian word for pasta, pasta). Evolutionary biologist Richard Dawkins used the FSM as an example in his book The God Delusion.

Principles of religion
Most of Henderson's principles are parodies of arguments made by anti-evolutionist creationists. Canonical dogmas:

* The invisible and intangible Flying Spaghetti Monster created the Universe, starting with a mountain, trees and a “dwarf”.
- All evidence for evolution was deliberately inserted by the FSM. He tests the faith of the Pastafarians by making things look older than they really are. “For example, a scientist might radiocarbon date an artifact. He finds that approximately 75% of the carbon-14 was transformed by electron emission, and from this he concludes that the artifact is approximately 10,000 years old, since carbon-14 has a half-life of 5,730 years. But what our scientist doesn't realize is that every time he makes a measurement, the Flying Spaghetti Monster changes the results with His Spaghetti Hand. We have many tests showing how this is possible and why He does it. It is, of course, invisible and passes through matter with ease.”
- Pastafarian paradise includes at least one beer volcano and one stripper factory.
- “Ramen” (English: Ramen or RAmen) - the official ending of prayers, some parts of the Gospel of the FSM, etc. and is a combination of the word "Amen" (used in Christianity, Judaism and Islam) and "ramen" - a Japanese noodle soup. This word is usually spelled with a capital "P" and "A", although spelling with a single capital "R" is also acceptable.

Flying Spaghetti Monster in Seattle, Fremont Solstice Parade 2011, Seattle, Washington, USA.

Pirates and global warming
According to the Pastafarian belief system, pirates (sea robbers) are "absolute divine creatures" and the original Pastafarians. Their portrayal as “thieves and renegades” is misinformation spread by Christian theologians of the Middle Ages. In fact, the Pastafarians say, they were "peace-loving explorers and spreaders goodwill", handing out candy to children.

The inclusion of pirates in the FSM teachings was part of Henderson's letter to the Kansas Department of Education as an illustration that correlation does not equal causation. ). In this letter, Henderson develops the argument that "global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes and other natural disasters are a direct consequence of the decline in pirates since 1800." The graph attached to the letter shows that as the number of pirates decreases, global temperatures rise, thereby illustrating that statistically related things are not necessarily causally related.

Eight "I wish you hadn't done this"

The Eight “You Better Not Do That” are the Pastafarian equivalent of the Old Testament Ten Commandments. They can be found in The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. According to Pastafarianism, they were given to Moses the Pirate (the FSM equivalent biblical Moses) by the Flying Spaghetti Monster himself. Initially there were ten of them, but two tables fell “on the way down the mountain.” Mosey himself called them “Commandments”, and his pirate gang called them “Condiments”. The absence of two "I wish you hadn't done that" presumably partly explains Pastafarian shaky moral standards:

1. You better not act like a narcissistic ass and a saint when you preach My spaghetti grace. If other people don't believe in Me, there's nothing wrong with that. I'm not that narcissistic, honestly. Besides, we're not talking about these people, so let's not digress.
2. It would be better if you did not justify in My name the oppression, enslavement, shredding or economic exploitation of others, well, you yourself understand, a generally vile attitude towards others. I do not require sacrifices, purity is mandatory for drinking water, not for people.
3. It would be better if you didn't judge people by their appearance, clothes, or the way they speak. Behave yourself, okay? Oh yes, and get this into your stupid head: A woman is a person. A man is a person. And a bore is always a bore. None of the people is better than others, with the exception of the ability to dress fashionably - I'm sorry, but I have gifted in this sense only women and only some of the guys - those who distinguish purple from crimson.
4. It would be better if you did not allow yourself to take actions that are unacceptable for yourself or your voluntary and sincere partner (who has reached an acceptable age and mental maturity). I suggest that everyone who disagrees go through the forest, unless they consider it offensive. In this case, they can turn off the TV and go for a walk for a change.
5. It would be better if you did not fight the bigoted, misogynistic and other evil ideas of others on an empty stomach. Eat, and then go to these bastards.
6. It would be better if you didn’t spend a lot of money on building churches, temples, mosques, tombs in the name of glorifying My pasta grace, because this money is better spent - choose what:
- to end poverty
- to cure diseases
- for a peaceful life, passionate love, and reducing the cost of the Internet.
I may be a complex carbohydrate omniscient creature, but I love simple joys life. Who, if not me, should know? After all, it was I who created everything.
7. It would be better if you didn’t tell everyone around you how I spoke to you. You're not that interesting to everyone. Stop thinking only about yourself. And remember that I asked you to love your neighbor, didn’t you get it?
8. It would be better if you did not treat others the way you want them to treat you when it comes to a huge number latex or Vaseline. But if the other person likes it too, then (following the fourth commandment) do it, take a photo, just for the love of God - wear a condom! After all, it's just a piece of rubber. If I didn't want you to enjoy the process itself, I would have provided thorns or something like that.

Pastriarch of the Russian Pastafarian Church Kama Pasta I made an appointment with the correspondent in the lobby shopping center"Smolensky Passage". A man of very presentable appearance, about forty years old, introduced himself as Vadim, but refused to give his last name, citing the fact that he had been successfully engaged in business for a long time and did not want his social activities to interfere with him. The conversation was interrupted several times phone calls, Vadim arranged business meetings with partners.

- How did you come to Pastafarianism?

The determining factor was the clericalization of our country, or rather, its pace. Three and a half years ago I became one of the founders of the Sanity Foundation. This is the only structure registered by the Ministry of Justice that defends the ideas of secularism and secular society V Russian Federation. We installed billboards opposite the White House with Article 14 of the Constitution, which states that Russia is a secular state and no religion in our country can be state or compulsory. The billboards hung for about a month, and many then protested and threw eggs at them. After this action, they learned about us: press secretary Kirill Vigilyansky called us “worldview enemies of the Church.” We created an expert council at the foundation, which included several serious scientists, including from the Russian Academy of Sciences Commission for Combating Pseudoscience, and collaborated with the Russian Atheist Society and transhumanists. But it was all too serious. I was looking for a lighter and more fun format. Pastafarianism pursues the same goals as the Sanity Foundation, but without the theological controversy and without such a serious expression. I myself made a website and registered it, I myself compiled questionnaires for those who want to join the Russian Pastafarian Church of the Macaroni Patriarchate. Well, he came up with a name for himself - Pastriarch Kama Pasta the First. A little later, several more people began to help me. Vicar Amirdzhan, Bishop of Domodedovo, Bishop Nikolai, head of the legal service of the church and others appeared.

What is Pastafarianism

Pastafarianism, or Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM), is a parody religion founded in 2005. 24-year-old Kansas man Bobby Henderson proclaimed the creation of a new denomination in response to the state Department of Education's decision to introduce the concept of intelligent creation as an alternative to the theory of evolution into the school curriculum. Henderson declared that his own concept that the world was created by a heavily drunk, spaghetti-and-meatballs Flying Spaghetti Monster was as valid and plausible as traditional Christian teachings. The young man demanded that as much time be spent teaching Pastafarianism as teaching intelligent design. Soon the Gospel of the FSM was written, in which, by analogy with the ten Old Testament commandments, the eight “It would be better for you not to do this” were formulated. For example: “You better not judge people by their appearance, their clothes, or the way they speak. Behave yourself, okay? Oh, yes, and get this into your stupid head: a woman is a person. A man is a person. And a bore is always a bore. None of the people is better than others, with the exception of the ability to dress fashionably - I’m sorry, but I have gifted in this sense only women and only some of the guys - those who distinguish purple from crimson.”

- Are you sure that a light and fun format will work better?

It's not better, it's just another way to communicate. I proceed from the fact that active people should communicate on different platforms. I am sure that proper, non-offensive trolling and laughter are powerful weapons in the fight against stubbornness and obscurantism. I would like people who don’t like the clericalization of society to see that there are many people like them. I would like there to be some drive and something fun in the public discussion about what is happening in our country.

The Russian Orthodox Church itself provides many reasons for fun, more than all the fighters against religion combined

- We already have a lot of fun.

This is true. The Russian Orthodox Church itself provides many reasons for fun, more than all the fighters against religion combined. You can recall the story of Patriarch Kirill’s watch, Mr. Chaplin’s speeches and a lot of other stories.

- Can we say that Pastafarianism is trolling the Russian Orthodox Church?

In fact, it's hard to call it trolling. I wouldn't want this project to turn into a fight against anyone. I don't want to cross the line between banter and insult. Although, by the way, new law about insulting believers in such a way that anything can be considered an insult. For example, in our store we have a T-shirt with the logo “Pastafarianism or Death,” and Orthodox activists have a similar slogan. Today they wrote to me that the font on our T-shirt resembles Church Slavonic and this may offend someone. I replied that this is the Izhitsa font, it has a creator and in no case belongs to any Church Slavs.

- What do you do in everyday life?

I work in finance, worked in an investment bank, and was the financial director of a large agricultural complex. Now I have own business. By the way, I once worked with a fairly large oligarch who collaborated with the Russian Orthodox Church. The Russian Orthodox Church is a fairly large business corporation.

In people's heads, pagan cults such as the holiday of Ivan Kupala, Orthodoxy and faith in bad omens, superstition. And at the same time, many still trust Darwin

- What do you believe in?

I was an atheist before I discovered the belief in the flying spaghetti monster. The fact is that a person’s faith often depends on confidence in his internal forces, and I'm confident. In difficult moments, the thought does not occur to me to shift responsibility to some bearded creature and ask him to solve my problems for me. Many people cannot get out of difficult situations on their own. life situations and grab the magic wand in the form of religion.

In general, there are quite a lot of public atheists in Russia, like Posner, Dorenko, Prokhorov. But since we are now in dark times due to clericalization, not everyone is ready to admit atheism out loud. For many people in government and business, this is fraught with problems.

- Why do you think the church and government in Russia are so closely intertwined?

Our government and the president had two options on how to build social order and where to look for those same spiritual bonds. Either look for them in something patriarchal and imperial, or in the Soviet past. It seems to me that until the last moment the imperial theme prevailed. Millennial Orthodox Church just connects the imperial history of Russia with our present. Therefore, the Russian Orthodox Church was entrusted with becoming a kind of spiritual leader. Reverse side Orthodoxy - nationality and nationalism. Excessive speculation on this topic forced nationalists to raise their banners more actively. It seems that this is why the authorities in lately increasingly turning to the Soviet model. Apparently, Orthodoxy failed to fulfill the function of guide that was assigned to it.

- Why do you think it didn’t work?

It seems to me that the citizens of our country are not really religious people. They call themselves Orthodox because through this word they connect themselves with the country, with its history. In people's heads, pagan cults such as the holiday of Ivan Kupala, Orthodoxy and belief in bad omens and superstition are mixed. And at the same time, many also trust Darwin. I don’t understand what the Russian Orthodox Church had to do with these people so that they would follow it. According to surveys, only six or seven percent of our population are churchgoers. This is the real flock of the Russian Orthodox Church. The church can influence them, but it is unlikely to influence the rest.

- Do you expect that there will be room for a pasta monster in this mess?

Of course, those who love pasta are already practically in our fun company. And if they also love beer, then in heaven we have a beer volcano for them.

- How many parishioners are there in your church?

Currently, 4,000 people have filled out questionnaires on the site. In the last few days, questionnaires have begun to arrive more often. By filling it out, the newly converted Pastafarian receives an electronic certificate stating that he is a member of the Russian Orthodox Church.

-What kind of people go to your church?

Our religion is aimed at people who know how to think critically, at skeptics, and in some cases even cynical ones. For people who can laugh at themselves. I think these are people who live in big cities, people with higher education. By the way, now the largest faction in our church is the IT people.

We want to see how the Ministry of Justice will react to this. The idea of ​​Pastafarianism is to show that you can believe in anything, and why not believe in a flying pasta monster?

- Why did you need to register as a religious group?

We want to see how the Ministry of Justice will react to this. The idea of ​​Pastafarianism is to show that you can believe in anything, and why not believe in a flying pasta monster? We want to test Pastafarianism on our authorities.

- But a religious organization based on a group can only be created after 15 years.

Yes, although the law is quite liberal, it protects traditional religious organizations. True, there is a nuance. Several years ago, a certain Kimli tried to register the Church of Scientologists in Siberia. His application was rejected based on this 15 year rule. Then he challenged the decision of the Ministry of Justice in the European Court of Human Rights and won the case in 2009.

Now if the Ministry of Justice applies this norm to us, it will turn out that it is violating the decision of the ECHR. And then, of course, we will also reach the European Court. Although, to be honest, I'm not sure it's easy for us let's register. And the point is not even in the 15-year limit, but in the religious studies examination, I think we will not be able to pass it.

The basic principle of Pastafarianism is the reduction of everything to the absurd. We are currently discussing several promotions, people are constantly offering something. For example, there was an idea to set up field kitchens on the street, as is now fashionable, and feed everyone noodles. I asked everyone to suggest ideas, and of course we will do something.

I meant something slightly different. The same Niko Alm, who ensured that he was allowed to take a driver’s license photograph in a colander, drew attention to a serious problem by reducing the provisions of the law to absurdity.

Obviously we'll try to do things like that. It’s just that until the last moment there were very few of us. I am ready to support people with information and help spread experience, but they themselves must offer ideas. Now, it seems to me, there will be more creativity.

- How will your church be financed?

The project of the Russian Pastafarian Church is categorically non-commercial. For example, I opened a Pastafarian T-shirt store on PrintDirect and set it to zero royalties. All prices there are equal to the cost price set by the company. On our website, to receive a paper certificate of ordination as a Pastafarian, you need to pay 200 rubles, and to become a bishop - 500. I did this to at least cover my phone costs, and printing the certificate also costs something. In any case, now I’m in the red, but I’m ready to take on small expenses for the church. I wouldn’t want our project to turn into some kind of serious office with accounting and an office.

And I’ll tell you something else on religious topics: or for example how it happened The original article is on the website InfoGlaz.rf Link to the article from which this copy was made -

Flying Spaghetti Monster

Few people talk about this, but very strange things are happening in our world. Judge for yourself: the New Zealand authorities have officially recognized Pastafarianism. Moreover, a certain Karen Martin (Karen Martyn) was appointed bishop of this amazing cult, and now she can, with good reason, marry parishioners.

This church officially appeared in 2005. Its founder was Oregon State University physicist Bobby Henderson, who wanted to fight the teaching of creationism in this way. In this he has a strong ally, the main deity of Pastafarianism: the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

In appearance, this newcomer to the American pantheon is a humanoid spaghetti-shaped creature with no mouth and meatball-shaped eyes. Despite the huge success in social networks(95% of messages in support and only 5% with the promise of eternal torment in hell), it is still very difficult to name exact number followers of this at least innovative religion. In any case, it is not difficult to distinguish them from mere mortals, because they usually wear a colander instead of a headdress.

On holidays, Pastafarians take out ceremonial clothes, that is, pirate costumes in the style of John Silver. Why? Great question. The fact is that, according to Pastafarian cosmology, these pirates, corsairs and other filibusters were creatures full of spirituality who plied the seas to distribute delicacies to the children of native peoples. In addition, their slow but sure disappearance has caused global warming, cyclones, earthquakes and even the emergence of Bush Jr. in the White House.

More importantly, these pirates also have a direct connection to the all-father, the Flying Spaghetti Monster, who somehow created our universe when he drank too much. This, by the way, explains its imperfections: difficulties with parking in Paris, lack of Albanian lessons in elementary school and an acute shortage of busty blondes in the neighboring bistro.

In response to the inevitable criticism of non-believers, Bobby Henderson, the founder and theologian of this spiritual enterprise, ridiculed all skeptics: “With millions, thousands of devoted believers, the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is considered a real religion even by its opponents, Christian fundamentalists, who for the most part admit that Our God has more meatballs.”

It is clear that not a single religious institution dared to challenge such reinforced concrete logic. And once the critics were silenced, all that remained was to hammer the final nail into the coffin of obscurantism: “I think we should be glad that one day these three theories will be given equal time in scientific pursuits in our country and around the world. A third to creationism, a third to the flying spaghetti monster, and a third to logical conclusions based on the overwhelming weight of visual evidence.” No worse than the resolution of the Socialist Party Congress.

The most important thing in all this is that pasta art and pataphysics continue to captivate minds, and that the main wealth is still people, while the Islamic State is doomed to vegetate in poverty. Amen (with Parmesan).

We are proud of the engineers
Hadron Collider
For we firmly believe
Into the pasta monster!

Whether you are poor or rich,
Forgotten or glorious
Our comrade and pirate
Let's glorify FSM!

Pasta and noodles
And noodles with meatballs
Our faith is good
Like a naked girl...

Ahead of the entire universe
Time, space-
Lights of good news
Pastafarianism!

Do you drink beer or Madeira?
Come instantly!
Our True Faith
This is awesome!

Pasta, pasta, pasta, pasta,
Pasta and meatballs!
Our faith is safe
Like a wife in bed!

Invigorating rays to everyone,
Tolstoy, huge,
Soaring in the air
Pasta monster!

Pastafarianism(English) Pastafarianism) is a pun based on Rastafarianism and the Italian word for pasta.

It all started with the invisible and intangible Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM) creating the Universe.

The second event was in 2005, when Bobby Henderson did not like what the state of Kansas wanted to include in mandatory school curriculum concept of "intelligent design".

It boiled down to the fact that the probability of accidents from which life emerged is negligible. Bobby said: “Yes, there may be a God, but then who will prove that this is exactly the God that the church implies?”

A little later, he proclaimed on his website a new belief in a supernatural Creator, similar to pasta and meatballs, and also invented the Holy Scriptures.

In an open letter on his website, Henderson proclaims belief in a supernatural Creator, the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and calls for the teaching of Pastafarianism in schools, thereby using a reductio ad absurdum argument against the doctrine of intelligent design.

Then Richard Dawkins used the Flying Spaghetti Monster in his book, where he demonstrated that the sacred scriptures of Pastafarianism are no different from existing ones, using the example of the Bible and the Koran.

The idea has spread to the masses and, despite its parody, “Pastafarianism” exists on the same rights as other religions, has official status and political power.

Postulates of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster:

1. The world was created by a Flying Pasta Monster with meatball eyes after drinking too much alcohol.
2. All the evidence for evolution was cleverly manipulated by the FSM.
3. Pastafarian paradise includes at least one beer volcano and one stripper factory.
4. All prayers must end with the word “RAMIN.” (from ramen - Japanese noodles)

Some passages from the Pastafarian Gospel:

— “ You better not act like a narcissistic ass and a saint when you preach My spaghetti grace. If other people don't believe in Me, there's nothing wrong with that. I'm not that narcissistic, honestly. Besides, we're not talking about these people, so let's not digress.”

— “ A woman is a person. A man is a person. And a bore is always a bore. None of the people is better than others, with the exception of the ability to dress fashionably - I'm sorry, but I have gifted in this sense only women and only some of the guys - those who distinguish purple from crimson.”

-“ It would be better if you did not fight the bigoted, misogynistic and other evil ideas of others on an empty stomach. Eat, and then go to these bastards.”

Some Pastafarian holidays:

Friday- most main holiday in Pastafarianism. On this day, true Pastafarians should do absolutely nothing. Celebration is not required, but is strongly recommended, for “no more can be done to honor His Macaroni Hand than to celebrate Friday carefully and regularly.”

Easter- a holiday that comes from the addition of the names of Christian Easter and Italian pasta.

Ramindan(Roltondan,Doshirakdan ) - a holiday when Pastafarians again eat tons of pasta, but in the form of noodles instant cooking, remembering his student years and showing how to have fun.

July 12- declared by the Russian Pastriarch, Kama Pasta I, a non-working day for all Pastafarians, because on July 12, 2013, the Russian Pastafarian Church notified the local government in Moscow about the creation of a religious group of the Russian Orthodox Church. Now Pastafarians in Russia have the right to legally perform pasta services and other religious rituals, as well as defend their religious feelings.

Some facts about the pasta religion:

• The main dogma of Pastafarianism is the denial of any dogma.

• In 2011, Austrian authorities allowed Pastafarian Nico Alm to have his driver's license photo taken with a colander on his head as a religious headdress. Niko filed a corresponding application using a reductio ad absurdum argument against allowing Muslims to be photographed wearing hijabs for documents. Since photographs with headdresses are allowed in Austria only for religious reasons, he justified his action by belonging to Pastafarianism. “My main goal is to make people think about the adequacy of the system,” he said. Here is his photo with rights

• One of the famous parishioners of the FSM Church is Pavel Durov.

• The head of the Russian Pastafarian Church is Pastriarch Khusama Pasta II (in the world Amir Amirovich Khusainov), who was appointed to this post on November 15, 2013 by the first Pastriarch of the Russian Orthodox Church Kama Pasta I (in the world Vadim Zhakenovich Kamashev), who created the Church in January 2011.

• In October 2013, a branch of the Pastafarian Church was registered in Ukraine.

• In July 2013, a resident of the Czech Republic, Lukas Novy, became the second Pastafarian to win the right to be photographed with a colander on his head for his driver’s license.

• On August 3, 2013, Pastafarianism became one of the main religions on VKontakte.

New teachings, branches of science and even religious movements appear constantly today, but little of this list acquires a certain status and global significance. But things are completely different with the new religion, which is called Pastafarianism. This new movement in the spiritual world is also called the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM). Until recently, it was considered only a certain sect, until it acquired the status

General information

So, Pastafarianism is a parody religion that was founded in 2005 by American Bobby Henderson. This citizen of the states was prompted to create such a church by the fact that in Kansas the subject “Intelligent Design” was included in the official school curriculum. It is also noteworthy that since then it has been read instead of “evolutionary doctrine.” On his official website, Henderson states that he sees the creator of our world as a certain creature consisting of pasta, and similar in general outline for a regular meatball. He also calls on everyone to introduce a course in Pastafarianism in schools along with other subjects, using the argument of “reduction to the absurd.” Despite the fact that this parody religion initially causes ridicule among many, it has long since become official.

Emergence

After Kansas schools began to study Intelligent Design, Bobby Henderson immediately made his first guess: “Yes, there is a God, but where can we find evidence that he is exactly as the church portrays him to us?” ? Personally, I see him in a completely different form, namely as a kind of creature made from pasta.” Based on all this, as well as based on the world’s Holy Scriptures (the Bible, the Torah, the Vedas), he created his own manul, which, in fact, is not much different from the above. Among the first adherents who joined this Church of the Spaghetti Monster were the so-called pirates. According to Bobby himself, they were peace-loving creatures who preached freedom of speech and also distributed candy to children. Handersen also notes that the whole incomprehensible religious situation that has developed in our years has manifested itself due to the fact that there are catastrophically few pirates in the world.

Basics of religion

As you know, recently all atheists and people who in every possible way reject any religion, calling themselves agnostics, in the countries of Europe and America can even be imprisoned for such blasphemy. Along with this, modern religions, which appear and disappear constantly, also cannot become a sufficient foundation for them to acquire faith. As for Pastafarianism, it became precisely the religion that made it possible for many atheists to leave the ranks of those “outcasts” who do not go to church and do not pray. We take into account in all this the fact that the Church is recognized as official, and at the same time this is a mockery of what our ancestors preached for centuries and millennia. Therefore, from the point of view of mathematics, Pastafarianism exists, in essence, but it is equal to zero. This religion may give you the right not to serve in the army, so as not to kill those who have eaten pasta at least once in their lives. Also, based on the fact that Muslims take passport photos in a burqa, believers in pasta meatballs can take a photo in a colander. In a word, Pastafarianism is an opportunity to troll all religious fanatics, plus at the same time expand your religious privileges.

Principles of religion

As noted above, the religion of Pastafarianism is based on those canons that are recorded in the Holy Scriptures. When drawing up these dogmas, special emphasis was placed on Christian Church, that is, the Bible. Therefore, reading all the commandments of Pastafarianism and principles, one can see a clear analogy, but it is impossible not to notice that this is still a parody, albeit a very well-composed one. Well, let's look at the foundations on which this worldview is built. Pastafarianism offers us the following canonical dogmas:

• An invisible pasta monster floating in the air created our Universe, and it started with trees, mountains and... a “dwarf”.
• Everything that exists in our world is a pasta monster built into everyone’s consciousness. He makes many things that surround us seem older than they actually are. Facts and scientifically proven patterns are also very illusory, since his Pasta Deity is capable of changing everything, passing through matter and remaining unnoticed. As a result, our faith, views, knowledge and other dogmas are constantly changing, although we do not notice it.
• The paradise where all Pastafarians go is a certain substance that includes a huge beer volcano and a striptease factory.
• The key word of religion is RAmen, which must certainly be written with two capital RA. It is clear that this is a parody of the “amen” familiar to all Christians, Muslims and Jews. Ramin is actually a Japanese instant soup that contains pasta.

What do pirates have to do with it?!

More or less, we have figured out what Pastafarianism means, how it is regarded and where it came from, but one more aspect remains not fully disclosed - the pirates, which were mentioned above. Well, let's clear up the picture. According to Hendersen, the pirates who existed in ancient times and robbed every ship they encountered were actually divine creatures. They were preachers of freedom of speech, will and religion, helped the suffering and children, and filled the world with positivity. In such a gloomy and negative light, they were presented to us by theologians who compiled their treatises back in the Middle Ages. In addition, global warming, which is now being monitored by all meteorologists on our planet, is also due to the fact that the number of pirates has begun to decline catastrophically since 1800. Bobby also claims that the increase in numbers contributed to the failure of the global warming conference.

Pastafarian Holidays

Like all world religions, whose age can be counted for thousands of years, modern religions have their holidays, holy days and other significant dates. Among the main celebrations of Pastafarianism, we highlight the following:

• Friday is the most important holiday. On every Friday of every week, every spaghetti monster believer should do absolutely nothing. It is not necessary to hold a celebration in honor of this significant day, but it is still strongly recommended. Friday is celebrated primarily to honor his Macaroni Hand, by whom our world was created.
• Easter is something that is celebrated much more often than Friday, or rather, after every meal of pasta. After such a meal, each believer must put on an eye patch and tell everyone about how he traveled to the bright world and met there with His Majesty the FSM.
• Ramindan is another “serial” holiday. Anyone who attends the Church of the Pasta Monster should definitely eat instant pasta from time to time. This is done in order to have the opportunity to remember how fun it was to live in our student years, when we had no money for anything more expensive than “doshirak”.
• All Pastafarians certainly celebrate Halloween. This autumn holiday You need to change into clothes and go to all residential buildings, hand out candy to the children.
• Pastafarians begin celebrating the holiday (simply the Holiday) at the end of December and end in mid-January. During this period, you don’t need to do anything except drink, eat and congratulate everyone you meet “Happy Holidays.” Let us note that this celebration is still canonical for Pastafarianism.
• On July 12, 2013, the religions of Russia were replenished with one more component. It turned out to be, as you guessed, Pastafarianism, which on the same day acquired official status in our country. From then to this day, all residents of Russia who believe in the pasta monster can not work throughout the day and at the same time perform public “pasta services.”

Christian opinions

Based on the reviews and comments that various people left on the official website of Bobby Henderson, we can draw the following conclusion. It is quite natural that for every person who is a believer (even to a small extent) Pastafarianism is blasphemy, a mockery, which is a reason for numerous insults and contempt for the Creator. Despite the fact that religion in many countries, including ours, is now recognized as official, few of the general masses go over to the side of the flying spaghetti monster. In the countries of Europe and America, many people raised small uprisings over such desecration of everything Divine that had been preserved by humanity for thousands of years. After the religions of Russia were replenished with one more item - Pastafarianism - there were no special changes in the lives of our compatriots.

Russian Pastafarian Church

On July 12, 2013, Russian was officially registered in our country. A few months later, about 27 religious communities had already been created that worshiped the flying spaghetti monster. Like all other religions in Russia that are considered generally accepted, Pastafarianism has its own “patriarch”. At the moment of its foundation and to this day it is Khusama Pasta the Second, or simply Hu (Amirjan Khusainov). He is also helped by a council of faithful associates, which is called the Sacred Colander (it consists of 10 people). Also, this religious body is often referred to in our homeland as the Russian Pastafarian Church named after the Pastriarchy.

It would be better if you didn't do this...

These are the words used in the religion of Pastafarianism to refer to the commandments, of which there are eight. This is a kind of analogue of the Old Testament commandments, which were compiled on the basis of the long journey of Moses. It is also generally accepted that the pasta monster himself passed on this information, which includes various aspects of life - from eating to sex - to a certain pirate named Mosey. It is also commonly believed that initially there were ten such commandments, but two of them were lost “on the way from Mount Salsa.” Well, let's look at what this holy scripture is and what it can teach us.

Eight Commandments of Pastafarianism

• You better not act like a typical holy preacher when you tell other people about my spaghetti grace. I am not so narcissistic, therefore it is not at all necessary to prove to everyone without exception that I really exist and that they need to believe in me.
• It would be better if you did not use My name as an excuse for economic decline, enslavement, oppression and other abominations. I don't need sacrifices at all.
• It would be better if you did not judge people by their clothes, appearance and manner of communication. By the way, get it into your head that a woman, just like a man, is a person, and a bore is a bore. And remember that the best people are those who know how to dress. I have given this ability to women and only a few men who can distinguish crimson from purple.
• It would be better if you did not allow yourself to commit those actions that make you sick, or a similar reaction can be traced in your partner. Anyone who disagrees with me can walk through the forest, but if this is offensive to them, then for a change you can turn off the TV and walk along the streets.
• You better not get into debates with misogynists, racists and other asshole organizations on an empty stomach. You've eaten - now you can go disperse them.
• It would be better if you did not spend a lot of money on the construction of churches, mosques, mausoleums and other meaningless structures in my Macaroni honor. This money would be better spent on reducing poverty, on curing illnesses of the poor, on world peace, or on passionate love.
• It would be better if you didn’t talk to everyone about the fact that I spoke to you. Believe me, you are not that interesting to everyone around you. Remember once and for all: I taught you mainly to love your neighbor.
• It would be better not to treat others the way you would like them to treat you, if we are talking about a huge amount of Vaseline and latex. The exception is if a person really wants it himself. Just for My sake, don’t forget to wear a condom, because it’s just a piece of elastic! If I wanted sex to be less pleasurable for you, I would add spikes to this product.

Pastfarianism in everyday and cultural life

The most vivid and, most importantly, relevant theory of Pastafarianism is given in Richard Dawkins' book The God Delusion. This literature has a biological evolutionary theme, so the flying spaghetti monster as a kind of “opposition” simply fits into it perfectly. The television series South Park uses quotes from this very book. In the cartoon “The Simpsons”, the main characters in one of the episodes eat spaghetti in the form of a pasta monster, thereby preaching Pastafarianism in absentia. A photo of His Majesty also hangs on the wall of one of the heroes of the series “Geeks”. In one of the online games - Prime World- there is a character named Ramin, which is also considered to be some kind of reference to this parody religion. We also note that if you take a closer look, the image of a flying spaghetti meatball can be found much more often than we might think. It is often used without even understanding the essence, but in some cases the FSM, which appears on posters, labels and other items, is a hidden advertisement for this new religious movement.

from wiki, for the lazy

Most of Henderson's principles are parodies of arguments made by anti-evolutionist creationists. Canonical dogmas:
The invisible and intangible Flying Spaghetti Monster created the Universe, starting with a mountain, trees and a “dwarf”.
All evidence for evolution was deliberately built in by the FSM. He tests the faith of the Pastafarians by making things look older than they really are. “For example, a scientist might radiocarbon date an artifact. He finds that approximately 75% of the carbon-14 atoms decayed by emitting electrons, and from this he concludes that the artifact is approximately 10,000 years old, since carbon-14 has a half-life of 5,730 years. But what our scientist doesn't realize is that every time he makes a measurement, the Flying Spaghetti Monster changes the results with His Spaghetti Hand. We have many tests showing how this is possible and why He does it. It is, of course, invisible and passes through matter with ease.”
Pastafarian paradise includes at least one beer volcano and one stripper factory.
"Ramen" (eng. Ramen or RAmen) is the official ending of prayers, some parts of the Gospel of the FSM, etc. and is a combination of the word "Amen" (used in Christianity, Judaism and Islam) and "ramen" - Japanese noodle soup . This word is usually spelled with a capital "P" and "A", although spelling with a single capital "R" is also acceptable.

In 2010, Bobby Henderson indirectly confirmed the parody of religion, writing in his blog: “FSM is still going strong though after 5 years we’re at the dangerous place where we either become more real or more fake and both worry me. Don’t want the church of FSM turning into Scientology or Mormonism.”

According to the Pastafarian belief system, pirates (sea robbers) are "absolute divine creatures" and the original Pastafarians. Their portrayal as “thieves and renegades” is misinformation spread by Christian theologians of the Middle Ages. In reality, Pastafarians say, they were "peace-loving explorers and spreaders of goodwill" who distributed candy to children.

The Eight “You Better Not Do That” are the Pastafarian equivalent of the Old Testament Ten Commandments. They can be found in The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. They include many aspects of life, from sexual behavior to food intake. According to Pastafarianism, they were given to Moses the Pirate (the FSM equivalent of the biblical Moses) by the Flying Spaghetti Monster himself. Initially there were ten of them, but two tables fell “on the way from Mount Salsa.” Mosey himself called them “Commandments”, and his pirate gang called them “Condiments”. The absence of two "I wish you hadn't done that" presumably partly explains Pastafarian shaky moral standards:
You better not act like a narcissistic ass and a saint when you preach My spaghetti grace. If other people don't believe in Me, there's nothing wrong with that. I'm not that narcissistic, honestly. Besides, we're not talking about these people, so let's not digress.
It would be better if you did not justify in My name the oppression, enslavement, shredding or economic exploitation of others, well, you yourself understand, a generally vile attitude towards others. I do not require sacrifices, purity is required for drinking water, not for people.
It's best that you don't judge people by their appearance, their clothes, or the way they speak. Behave yourself, okay? Oh yes, and get this into your stupid head: A woman is a person. A man is a person. And a bore is always a bore. None of the people is better than others, with the exception of the ability to dress fashionably - I'm sorry, but I have gifted in this sense only women and only some of the guys - those who distinguish purple from crimson.
It would be better if you did not allow yourself to take actions that are unacceptable for yourself or your voluntary and sincere partner (who has reached an acceptable age and mental maturity). I suggest that everyone who disagrees go through the forest, unless they consider it offensive. In this case, they can turn off the TV and go for a walk for a change.
It would be better if you did not fight the bigoted, misogynistic and other evil ideas of others on an empty stomach. Eat, and then go to these bastards.
It would be better if you didn’t spend a lot of money on building churches, temples, mosques, tombs in the name of glorifying My pasta grace, because this money is better spent - choose what:
to end poverty
to cure diseases
for a peaceful life, passionate love and lower Internet costs.
I may be a complex carbohydrate omniscient creature, but I love the simple joys of life. Who, if not me, should know? After all, it was I who created everything.
It would be better if you didn’t tell everyone around you how I spoke to you. You're not that interesting to everyone. Stop thinking only about yourself. And remember that I asked you to love your neighbor, didn’t you get it?
You'd better not treat others the way you want them to treat you when it comes to copious amounts of latex or Vaseline. But if the other person likes it too, then (following the fourth commandment) do it, take a photo, just for the love of God - wear a condom! After all, it's just a piece of rubber. If I didn't want you to enjoy the process itself, I would have provided thorns or something like that.

"as an alternative to evolutionary teaching. In an open letter on his website, Henderson proclaims belief in a supernatural Creator resembling pasta and meatballs - the Flying Spaghetti Monster - and calls for study Pastafarianism in schools, thereby using the reductio ad absurdum argument against the doctrine of intelligent design.

Followers of the Flying Pasta Monster (FMP) call themselves Pastafarians (a play on words based on Rastafarianism and the Italian word for pasta, pasta).

Principles of religion

Most of Henderson's principles are parodies of arguments made by anti-evolutionist creationists. Canonical dogmas:

Pirates and global warming

The impact of the number of pirates on global warming

According to the Pastafarian belief system, pirates (sea robbers) are "absolute divine creatures" and the original Pastafarians. Their portrayal as "thieves and renegades" is misinformation spread by Christian theologians of the Middle Ages. In reality, Pastafarians say, they were "peace-loving explorers and spreaders of goodwill" who distributed candy to children.

The inclusion of pirates in the FSM teachings was part of Henderson's letter to the Kansas Department of Education as an illustration that correlation does not equal causation. Post hoc ergo propter hoc- after this, therefore, as a result of this en: Post hoc ergo propter hoc (lat.) ). In this letter, Henderson develops the argument that "global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes and other natural disasters are a direct consequence of the decline in pirates since 1800." The graph attached to the letter shows that as the number of pirates decreases, global temperatures rise, thereby illustrating that statistically related things are not necessarily causally related.

Eight "I wish you hadn't done this"

The eight "I wish you hadn't done that" are the Pastafarian equivalent of the Old Testament Ten Commandments. They can be found in The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. According to Pastafarianism, they were given to Moses the Pirate (the FSM equivalent of the biblical Moses) by the Flying Spaghetti Monster himself. Initially there were ten of them, but two tables fell “on the way down the mountain.” Mosey himself called them “Commandments”, and his pirate gang called them “Condiments”. The absence of two "I wish you hadn't done that" presumably partly explains Pastafarian shaky moral standards:

1. You better not act like a narcissistic ass and a saint when you preach My spaghetti grace. If other people don't believe in Me, there's nothing wrong with that. I'm not that narcissistic, honestly. Besides, we're not talking about these people, so let's not digress.
2. It would be better if you did not justify in My name the oppression, enslavement, shredding or economic exploitation of others, well, you yourself understand, a generally vile attitude towards others. I do not require sacrifices, purity is required for drinking water, not for people.
3. It's best that you don't judge people by their appearance, their clothes, or the way they speak. Behave yourself, okay? Oh yes, and get this into your stupid head: A woman is a person. A man is a person. And a bore is always a bore. None of the people is better than others, with the exception of the ability to dress fashionably - I'm sorry, but I have gifted in this sense only women and only some of the guys - those who distinguish purple from crimson.
4. It would be better if you did not allow yourself to take actions that are unacceptable for yourself or your voluntary and sincere partner (who has reached an acceptable age and mental maturity). I suggest that everyone who disagrees go through the forest, unless they consider it offensive. In this case, they can turn off the TV and go for a walk for a change.
5. It would be better if you did not fight the bigoted, misogynistic and other evil ideas of others on an empty stomach. Eat, and then go to these bastards.
6. It would be better if you didn’t spend a lot of money on building churches, temples, mosques, tombs in the name of glorifying My pasta grace, because this money is better spent - choose what:
   1. to end poverty
   2. to cure diseases
   3. for a peaceful life, passionate love, and lower Internet costs.
      I may be a complex carbohydrate omniscient creature, but I love the simple joys of life. Who, if not me, should know? After all, it was I who created everything.
7. It would be better if you didn’t tell everyone around you how I spoke to you. You're not that interesting to everyone. Stop thinking only about yourself. And remember that I asked you to love your neighbor, didn’t you get it?
8. You'd better not treat others the way you want them to treat you when it comes to copious amounts of latex or Vaseline. But if the other person likes it too, then (following the fourth commandment) do it, take a photo, just for the love of God - wear a condom! After all, it's just a piece of rubber. If I didn't want you to enjoy the process itself, I would have provided thorns or something like that.

FSM in popular culture

• In the British television sitcom The IT Crowd, posters of the Flying Spaghetti Monster are hung in the room where the main computer characters work;
• In the TV series South Park, Richard Dawkins also uses an example from the book The God Delusion.
• In the TV series The Simpsons, Homer Simpson uses the exclamation "Holy macaroni!" (As a synonym for “Oh my God!”)