What to tell your husband if you decided to forgive betrayal. How to forgive a cheating husband and save a family: advice from a psychologist. happy family life

Instruction

Let the tears flow. Cry as much as you can. Do it all at once, without stretching or luring depression into you. Let the steam come out, the veil of indignation, aggression, arrogance, poisonous green anger will fall off. You need to calm down to start thinking, and then to act.

You found out that your spouse is or. Be sure of this as much as possible. Try to find out who this woman is, what she is. How long is this romance, how serious is it, does one of the mutual acquaintances know about her husband's spree - find answers to these questions.

Now it's time to dig into yourself. Think about the reason: a crisis in family life, the result of long-faded feelings, accumulated domestic or financial problems, lack of attention on your part, and the like. Try to understand what was the impetus for your spouse to start a relationship on the side.

Talk with . Do not shout, do not throw accusations and vases at the same time. You have already put forward your version (mentally), now listen to his opinion. Do not put pressure on your spouse, calmly get to the truth, no matter how bitter it turns out to be.

Decide for yourself what is more expensive for you: save your family and improve relationships, or send your loved one to hell. If the second option is closer to you, then, without hesitation, ask your spouse to collect their belongings and free the territory. You will be able to forgive him when he leaves, with time. The sooner you meet a new prince on a white horse on your way, the easier it will be to forgive the past betrayal. You will begin to perceive the past as a necessary stage for a brighter future. Also say thank you to the one who once betrayed you.

If you think your family should be given another chance, then fight. Fight, squeezing aggression into a fist, directing negative energy into a good deed, into action. Remember all the things that attracted your spouse when you first started dating. Direct all the potential to create a "new you", better than the old one in a thousand times. Improve yourself, become an ideal not only for your spouse, but also for potential boyfriends. Flirting will cheer you up and give you fuel to work in the same direction.

Do not remember the betrayal yourself and do not remind your spouse. At your next suspicion and desire to tighten the collar of your spouse, take a break, relax and smile. Drive away such thoughts.

Make the man seek your favor. Sexual relationships will have to be restored piece by piece, perhaps they will not be very pleasant for you for some time. The best advice: make love when you feel like it, not your spouse. A man should try to seduce you, just like the very first time. The shadow of the third superfluous in bed will remind you of what happened until elementary trust is established between you.

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Women are often blamed for cheating on their own husbands. There is an opinion that the fair sex should give all possible and impossible forces to prevent their beloved from leaving. It's just that not everyone thinks so. In order to maintain a harmonious family hearth, men, as well as women, need to adhere to a list of certain rules.

What if the spouse still decided to cheat and committed betrayal? After all, it is extremely difficult to continue coexistence after such a shame. Not all women know how to forgive a cheating husband, advice from a psychologist will help you find the right way out of the situation. In the article you will have the opportunity to find out what experts think about this topic.

Should I forgive my husband's betrayal?

The situations that develop during the period of family life are completely different, both positive and bearing problems and negative. Some women hide resentment towards their spouses because of trifles, and someone easily forgives even the most deplorable acts against them.

READ ALSO: How to behave if the husband cheats, but does not leave: advice from a psychologist.

Another thing is if you have a question about how to forgive cheating on your husband. In this case, you will have to gather all your strength into a fist and not make the wrong decision for most women. Try to contact experienced professionals in such a difficult situation.

Watch the video. Is cheating worth it? Mila Levchuk.

Reflecting on how to forgive cheating on her husband, the instructions of psychologists, as a rule, bear good fruit:

It is required to accept the fact that the moment of betrayal with a strange woman took place. In the event that you really love your husband with all your heart, then try to forgive him and save the family, forgetting about what happened and leaving a harmonious relationship filled with love and understanding;
Try to just start a conversation. It is extremely important that the atmosphere is quiet and calm, without negative points. Only in this situation will the husband be able to discern your wisdom and prudence. As a result of the conversation, the spouse must repent of his deed. If you manage to make him accept the situation and feel guilty, then the chances of maintaining a family hearth for many years will appear;
When asked whether it is worth forgiving the spouse of infidelity, the recommendations of psychologists say that for a certain period of time it is still worth living separately from each other. In the event that he wants to change and improve the old relationship, you must leave for a short time. After a woman has completely forgiven her man, it will be possible to think about resuming family life;
Forgiving your husband's betrayal is more difficult if you can't imagine life without him. Try to distract yourself: come up with a hobby, passion, plunge into work. Finding an interesting activity to your liking, you can perfectly escape from family problems. This will only benefit the relationship, and it will become easier to forgive your spouse;
Children always bring happiness. They will most quickly be able to help forget about the terrible betrayal. If the spouse seeks to save the family, and the rash act was a fleeting mistake, and he admits this, then try to give him a chance;
Scrolling through the memory of happy moments from the past, concentrating on children, it will be possible to quickly improve relationships and breathe a second life into them.

accept the situation

How to accept the fact of infidelity, forgive her husband, if you just can’t come to your senses? You definitely need to throw out emotions: cry, discuss with loved ones. Listening to lyrical music will have a therapeutic effect on the nervous system.

8 out of 10 psychologists advise physical activity to relieve emotions

Go for a walk, visit the gym, go jogging. Physical activity will have a positive effect on the psyche.

Containment of negative emotions, closing from everyone will literally corrode from the inside. That is why try to do something useful, thus giving vent to anger. The key condition is not to show a storm of emotions towards the offender.

The recommendations of psychologists say that it is useful to speak out. At the same time, by reproaching your spouse, you only run the risk of moving away from him more strongly. That is why it is recommended to use the "empty chair" technique. Try to imagine your husband sitting in a chair across from you. Speak out to empty space. Feelings of indignation and resentment will begin to go away, thanks to the spoken phrases and experienced emotions, and the level of increase in conflict in the couple will decrease.

take care of yourself

How to forgive the betrayal of a spouse, and, most importantly, to accept it, absolutely realizing the feeling of one's dignity? Insecure women are very painful to endure betrayal. Confident - on the contrary, because they know their worth.

Men prefer rather slightly self-confident persons.

Therefore, communicate, have fun, attracting everyone's attention. Go shopping to update your wardrobe, visit a beauty salon, increase your self-esteem, love yourself!

As often as possible, remember compliments in your direction: from friends, relatives, work colleagues, mostly boyfriends. It would be better to reflect all these thoughts in a diary, re-reading from time to time. Betrayal is a kind of challenge to self-esteem. Try to regain your admiration.

speak frankly

Cheating on the part of a spouse can often be provoked by the behavior of the wife herself. Try to identify the true motive for cooling off in a relationship, discuss the problem together. Heart-to-heart talks will help to establish mutual understanding, returning stability to relationships, and sincerity to feelings.

Listen carefully to your lover's point of view. Keep your composure, keep your emotions in check. Aggression will only serve as a provocation to a defensive reaction, and it will become difficult for the offender to show hidden emotions. Only peaceful negotiations will help resolve the conflict. Realizing the true reason for the betrayal can subsequently improve relationships.

IT IS INTERESTING! Is cheating worth it? Let's figure it out with the experts.

Psychologist's consultation

The problem of how to forgive the betrayal of a husband who betrayed you, experts recommend solving the most correctly. By resorting to an assessment of a specific situation, the family counselor judges absolutely impartially. Often, deceived wives resort to making fundamentally wrong decisions: they leave the family, file for divorce, take revenge, remain in alliances with inveterate womanizers. The view of a specialist from the outside will have a beneficial effect.

The advice of psychologists says that every, even, at first glance, insurmountable situation, it is possible to overcome, resolve. Mostly in cases where both spouses want to make the maximum amount of effort. Many couples do not want to listen to opinions and advice from outsiders. It’s just that a knowledgeable person (specialist) will competently suggest ways to restore trust, return mutual respect, and contribute to the acquisition of confidence. It is more rational to deal with two. In the event that the husband is categorically against attending sessions, then come alone.

The consultant will contribute to the development of negative angry emotions: anxiety, anger, pain, resentment, self-doubt, depressive disorder.

Marriage is a union made in heaven. If you cannot understand what to do after your husband's betrayal, visit a church, go to an individual confession with a priest who can suggest an objective solution to the problem. The instructions of the holy father often say that it is necessary to understand whether there is true love. It is extremely important to realize whether spouses love each other, because without such a wonderful feeling it is simply impossible to create a strong and harmonious union. If you love, then try to forgive the betrayal, regardless of whether you want to be with this person or let him go.

When asked how to forgive betrayal, the father's advice concerns the need to be able to forgive everything. If there is love, then you can be happy, and forgiving your beloved will not be as difficult as it seems at first glance.

When to forgive

In the event that the husband was caught cheating not for the first time and there are no guarantees that this will not happen again, is it worth giving the person another chance? As a rule, such people do not change. If a person, having betrayed once, swears allegiance, but after some time, repeats a bad deed again, then the suffering half should immediately understand that this process will be repeated endlessly.

A chance for forgiveness can be honored if:

The man was seduced by the fatal beauty and simply could not resist;
Decided to try something new without thinking about the consequences;
Changed while intoxicated.

There can be a lot of reasons for a one-time adventure “to the side”, because all people are different, exactly the same as situations.

When You Can't Forgive

A man who has committed treason can always be given another chance to correct. It's just that it's not always necessary. When asked whether it is worth forgiving a cheating spouse, recommendations most often indicate that yes, indeed, forgiveness is a wise decision that can save a family union. But it is far from being rational for all situations.

90% of men who cheat once will do it again

If even after the words you said that you are aware of infidelity, the husband continues the relationship with another person, then there is no way out but to leave. It will be very difficult to accomplish this, however, it is worth showing your character, gathering your will into a fist and demonstrating that you are a strong woman who is able to cope with the difficulties of any nature.

Is it possible to forgive cheating husband

If you had to deal with a betrayal of your husband, try to follow the advice of a psychologist to alleviate mental pain:

Do not be in proud loneliness. Meet as often as possible with friends, relatives, relatives, work colleagues. Talk with them on abstract topics, in no case should you get hung up on your problem and withdraw into yourself;
Try to pay special attention to sleep, because this is the best medicine. Overwork, which is associated with lack of sleep, can adversely affect your unstable emotional state;
You should not try to take revenge on your spouse by suddenly throwing yourself into the arms of another man. A casual relationship will not bring consolation, but will only add negative emotions;
Try to take all your free time: plunge headlong into work, remember a long-forgotten, but so beloved hobby, or find a new one. The less time you have left for negativity in your head, the sooner the healing process will begin;
Try to live on, because life is beautiful! Remember that this is not the last step, but just a stage through which you need to step over in order to move on. There are a huge number of ways to make yourself truly happy, and not always a man is needed for this.

It is unfortunate that modern men too often began to step over women's emotions and experiences without feeling guilty. All situations are extremely similar to one another, with the exception of small details.

Watch the video. Change: forgive or not?

The reasons

If, despite everything, you continue to love your spouse very much, and he does not make sense to live without you, then forgiveness is the right decision. Apparently, at some point you lost contact. Naturally, you should not influence your husband through children. Think about whether your feelings are still alive, whether you are still close, kindred souls. In this case, forgiveness is the best way out of this situation.

If you cannot figure out how to forgive betrayal by your spouse and move on, psychologists strongly recommend that you remember all the good things that once happened between you. Many couples benefit from the resumption of the initial stage of the relationship: romance, kissing, dating. Try to cook a great dinner for your spouse with the same continuation. You will see that the situation will improve soon.

How to forgive and survive a cheating husband

As a result of the foregoing, we can firmly say that treason is not the end of a relationship. According to statistics, couples who have experienced betrayal become closer and stronger.

It is difficult to come up with a more difficult test than the betrayal of a loved one. The woman feels humiliated and confused, it is hard for her to talk about mental pain even with close people. When you live with a man for a long time, you do not believe that he is able to hug and kiss another woman. However, no one is immune from such a situation. How to act in this situation and behave with your husband, we will talk in this article.

Is cheating worth it?

Each woman, of course, has her own line of admissibility. One considers a kiss on the cheek of another girl already a betrayal. And the second is ready to forgive her husband numerous intimate relationships with other girls. The difference between these women lies in their self-esteem and self-esteem. The second woman has low self-esteem and self-worth. And she needs to work on this with a psychologist, otherwise nothing will change in her life, relationships with a man will always be full of pain for her.

It is important to understand that a man treats a woman the way she allows him to do so. If a husband understands that his misbehavior towards his wife is getting away with him, then he will continue to behave this way. And cheating is bad behavior. Even if you decide to forgive your husband's infidelity, you need to do it correctly. Otherwise, the first betrayal will be followed by a second, a third, and so on. By forgiving the wrong way, you give your husband the green light to keep doing it. Why not? After all, you still forgive him. So men begin to slowly but surely degrade.

Therefore, here is the conclusion: for the first time, you can forgive your husband's betrayal if you are ready. The second time - never! But even for the first time, you need to forgive treason correctly.

Before answering the question of whether it is worth forgiving your husband's first betrayal, outline for yourself the following main points:

Think and analyze your feelings, do you feel love for your husband.
Imagine that the betrayal did not happen, do you want to continue living with him or is it better to voluntarily leave.
Analyze whether you were happy with your husband or family life brought more suffering than joy.

Often the best solution is to simply break up, as the relationship has already been damaged before. Cheating is an ordeal that can completely kill trust. And it will be very difficult to restore it. There are situations in which making concessions is simply pointless. We are talking about systematic betrayals, regular insults from her husband, irreconcilable differences. If you ignore such signals and forgive your spouse for everything, you are doing yourself a disservice.

What to do after the news of the betrayal?

If you decide to forgive your husband and restore the relationship, you need to act wisely.

Pull yourself together

First of all, you need to stop feeling sorry for yourself and consider yourself the most offended woman in the world. However, there is no need to hide your feelings and harbor resentment, which will break out after a while. It is best to get angry and throw out all the pain: yelling, hitting the pillow, jumping and crying. Such psychotherapy will help ease mental pain. It should be done alone.

You can't do stupid things. This includes situations where a girl throws all the things of her beloved out of the house, tries to deal with a homeowner or commit adultery herself. Better to do nothing than to regret later.

Non-standard reaction

Show your husband that he acted unworthily, but do it differently than usual. If you are a quiet and reserved person, you should show your strength and even anger. Expressive individuals, on the contrary, need to be calm and modest. Your task is to surprise your spouse with an unusual reaction. In a conversation with him, make him feel guilty for what he did. Feeling guilty should be a punishment for your partner.

disperse

After that, you should put your husband out the door. If you live on its territory, then pack your things and leave, you also need to take your children with you. This is important to do if you value your relationship with your husband. He must receive damage for his deed. If you do not separate on the same day, then it will be much more difficult to save the relationship. After you separate, cut off contact with your husband. He must fully experience what it is like to live without you. During this time, he is fully aware of how much he needs you.

But if there are children, then you do not need to deprive them of communication with their father so that your crisis does not affect them. In this case, you give your husband the opportunity to communicate with the children, but you yourself do not talk to him: go to another room, leave on business, and so on.

Start changing your life

Memories of betrayal are difficult to get out of your head, every day your thoughts will be occupied with them. The best solution is to find yourself a new hobby that will help you get over the offense. Dive headfirst into it. Over time, your hobby can become something significant, develop into a profession. It can be anything - foreign language courses, cycling, fitness or ikebana. It's never too late to try something new!

Surround yourself with people who love you and share your experiences with them. It is important to find a circle of people who will support you in this difficult moment.

Change your image, take care of your appearance. Do your best to look great. Go in for sports, go on vacation to another country or city.

Love yourself

Insecure girls are the most difficult to experience the hardships of betrayal. Conversely, attractive women who are accustomed to attention from men are easier to endure the difficult circumstances of their personal lives. Try to love yourself for who you are.

Take care of yourself, it never hurts! Visit a hairdresser and beautician, buy new beautiful clothes and lingerie, feel beautiful and sexy. Do not try to prove anything to your husband and others, do it for yourself. Perhaps it is the betrayal of your husband that will give you an impetus for development and a more interesting life.

Children

Never use a child as a punishment for your spouse. With such an action, you will only make worse for any child. Solve all existing adult problems on your own and do not manipulate children. If problems such as betrayal and betrayal arise in the family, try to pay even more attention to children. Take a walk, take up a hobby, relax.

If you already have a fairly adult child, correctly discuss the current situation and the absence of a father with him. Do this without anger and hatred so that the child does not feel enmity and does not take your side. You can not argue and quarrel in front of a child, sort things out.

Why should this be done?

After you leave and break up the relationship, the husband realizes how much damage he has done to you and your relationship. He will have time to think about how much he values his family, whether he needs you. If you stop contacting him, he will realize the irreversibility of the situation, and this is not what he expected. Especially if earlier you easily forgave him a lot. And he starts to panic. He will chase you and ask you to come back. Psychologists say that this is how husbands react to the departure of their wife after the news of infidelity. And this is the only way to discourage him from wanting to change in the future.

He must be forgiven with great difficulty. And this means not from the first call with a request to return, not for words. And for deeds! He must become obsessed with bringing you back, following you around, sitting at the door of your house. And you must be cold. And only when his actions (not words!) Prove to you that he is ready to do anything just to get you back, you can enter into negotiations. And at this moment it is important to put forward your conditions on which you are ready to forgive him and renew the relationship.

If the husband does not begin to pursue you after leaving and breaking up the relationship? Yes, it could be. And you need to be ready for this. Only those husbands who do not love and do not value their wives and the family as a whole will behave this way. After the wife leaves, they will breathe a sigh of relief and go to have fun with other girls. And even in this situation, you will win, because you will get rid of the person who never loved you. And by maintaining a relationship with such a person, you doom yourself to an unhappy family life, in which the husband will continue to cheat on you and will never love and respect you. Do you need it? I do not think so.

Therefore, the conclusion is: if the husband does not make efforts to return you, then file for divorce.

How to behave with your husband, forgiving treason?

The first step is to talk to your husband and ask him to tell you honestly why he cheated on you, what prompted him to do this. You can give vent to your emotions and explain how much his act caused you pain. It is important to restore trust and be able to listen to each other.
After the resumption of relations with her husband, do not behave the way you did before the betrayal. Take note of what prompted him to cheat. Change your lifestyle, study the psychology of relationships, listen to your spouse.
If you took him back, then no longer remember the betrayal, do not poke his nose into it during a quarrel. If at every unpleasant situation you remind him of his misconduct, the chances of further normal relations are scanty.
Do not tolerate even a hint of other women.
Do not remember the betrayal and do not expect a new one.

When making a final decision, I advise you to write out in two columns the positive and negative qualities of your spouse. You will clearly understand what to do. Analyze your behavior. Why did he even have a mistress? Perhaps you paid little attention to your husband or did not share his hobbies. Having dealt with the situation, you can establish further relationships.

Families break up for various reasons, but one of the most common reasons for divorce is undoubtedly adultery. For some, adultery is a trauma for a long time, for someone it is the beginning of a new life. But in one case or another, betrayal makes you think and change the vector of familiar relationships. What to do if you find out about your husband's infidelity, says psychologist Ekaterina Fedorova.

When journalists asked Pope Francis I how he feels about gays, they received the following answer: "Who am I to condemn them?" Dad is a wise man, even he is not ready to condemn gays - how can we condemn someone for treason?

All people make mistakes. Cheating can be a mistake, but marriage can also be a mistake. Not everyone succeeds in meeting the ideal man and creating a happy family with him, not immediately and not always. Many couples, before understanding the value of each other, have to go through more than one. The most important thing here is to understand: is it treason or betrayal?

How is betrayal different from betrayal?

If a person worked in one company, and then took and left for another, where they are ready to pay him more, this is treason, and if he not only left, but also took the database with him, this is a betrayal. In the first case - a simple change in attitudes, in the second - also severe damage: moral and material. The difference should be understood, because many call everything a betrayal.

Of course, every woman has her own limit of admissibility, which can change significantly with age and circumstances. But the husband changed the next day after with his best friend or went to a brothel with friends after 15 years of marriage - you see, there is a difference.

There are fleeting connections that, in principle, can be forgiven, but it happens that a man gradually begins to live in two families. There, children can be born, and after a while the mistress begins to claim something. Each case is individual, and if it is difficult to forgive betrayal, then you can turn a blind eye to betrayal at least once.

How to forgive betrayal? 4 steps for a woman

Despite popular talk about men's propensity for polygamy, no man considers cheating the norm. Whatever he says, it is an attempt to justify himself, at least to himself. Having cheated on his wife, a man still feels guilty, so give him another chance. So, what to do (and what not to do) in case of cheating husband?

When a relationship comes to a standstill (it happened because of her husband's infidelity or for some other reason), The first thing a woman should do is take care of herself.. If your husband is really dear to you, forget about everything and remember: when was the last time you visited a beautician, a hairdresser, bought new underwear, put on a sexy dress? Go to the mirror and try to objectively evaluate what you see. Very often the problem of cheating is a problem with the appearance of a woman.
Don't say anything to anyone try to forget and help a man forget it.

Some psychologists recommend that their clients be absolutely sincere with a partner. They sat down in the evening, talked about their adventures, repented, forgave - and started life from scratch. Practice shows that this is not the best option.

Imagine: people have been married for 20 years, raised their children, and after a breakdown, they went to such a psychologist and decided to implement the recommendations in the evening. They sat opposite each other and began to tell how, with whom, when and how much. They told - and it became unclear to both why this marriage should be saved at all. No one can guarantee that your significant other will withstand this stream of truth. How to live with a person who has deceived you for many years?

Try to accept the fact that 90% of men have cheated at least once in their lives. Yes, this is unpleasant information, but statistics are stubborn things, you can’t argue with them. Rare men begin to cheat immediately after the wedding, but after ten, twenty years of marriage, believe me, they already have something to repent of.
Start enjoying life. Sign up for a painting school or learn to dance the tango, start your morning with breakfast at a cafe or bake your own cake, travel, meet people you like. In a word, take a break from love problems and do what you have long wanted, but for some reason you have denied yourself.

When cheating husband is not a reason for divorce

I know one woman who could not forgive her husband's betrayal, divorced. Four years have passed since then. I meet her periodically - she is still lonely, but this is not even the main thing. The main thing is that she does not look happy. Who knows, maybe if she found a way to forgive her husband and somehow live with him further, she would be better off.

Our psyche has the ability to adapt, to adapt to any circumstances, to any requirements of society, environment. Tracking down, trying to find out the details is only poisoning the soul and destroying the psyche. Do not think about your husband's mistress - think about your relationship with him: they need to be restored, and preferably in tandem with a good specialist.

I believe that cheating on a husband is not always a reason for divorce. You can forgive treason and then still use it. Remember the movie "Love and Doves"? An excellent illustration on this subject. He went to his mistress, and then returned home beaten by a dog, and his wife accepted him. Moreover, she drew the right conclusions for herself: she began to accept his interests, allowed him to leave the dovecote. And he was grateful to her for everything, they began a new life.

Why did he even have a mistress? Yes, because his wife did not want to accept his hobbies, she did not like his dovecote. The betrayal dotted the "i", everyone made the right conclusions and began to live happily.

How to forgive a cheating husband and move on

How dare he, how could he throw under the feet of some walking our common life with him ?! Made a mockery and humiliated our love. Disgraced in front of relatives, friends and even neighbors. How many years did they live as one. Were happy! And now sit and think about how to forgive your husband's betrayal and live on. Is it possible to have a right to love and happiness? After the betrayal? The state of the senses and the body is indeed akin to death. Change split life into before and after.

Once, in the middle of a conversation, he suddenly said, as he slashed: "I fell in love with another!" The world exploded with fragments of past years, legs were paralyzed. Questions and answers sounded in a shocked stupor. Everything was worthless, belated. Sobs, accusations. She reproached herself with the fact that “two are to blame for treason”! The betrayal of her husband knocked down not figuratively. It actually killed. At the same time, you understand with your brains: you have to live. Have kids. At least for their sake, a woman must continue to exist. So, we must be able to somehow forgive the betrayal of her husband and live on. But how?!

Where to put the inner pain from resentment the size of the ocean? Husband and wife - isn't it for life? And if he is the first and only man? Vaudeville vulgarity turned out to be a nightmare of life. It seems that the relationship cannot be glued back into a whole family - neither in words nor in deeds. And certainly not return what was. After a night of sobs, already alone, you rush to your friends. A little sense. They, of course, advise each to their own. In a feminine way. But this is not their life, it is easy to argue from the outside.

Then - to my mother. And who else should bear this sickness, who should I ask how to survive the betrayal of my husband? Only it turns out that the mother is far from always and can understand everything. In terms of meaning, you find yourself, it seems, as if you yourself are to blame for everything. One more blow. World has gone mad. If close people do not understand each other, then who can you rely on at all ?! And most importantly...

How to survive the betrayal of a loved one

And stay alive. To forgive the betrayal of a loved one, psychology suggests trying to take his place, regret, let go of resentment. But these are just words! How can you feel sorry for this bastard? Betrayed once, betrayed again! How can you take his place if you yourself are as pure as dew in a meadow?! At the same time, is it right to leave children without a father, a family without a master? Resentment strangles with a black snake, crushes with a stone. And before my eyes there is a bright video sequence of how the two of them are tumbling. What is the advice of a psychologist...

Get these thoughts and pictures out of my head. You go to bed, wake up in the morning - again and again. You torment yourself for days on end. And then he kind of asks to come back, kind of guilty and asks for forgiveness. Wow! Maybe he's lying again, he lied, as it turned out. Quite possibly, everything lasted much longer than he said. How can you trust your loved one after cheating? Here, at least in principle, to understand - is it necessary to forgive the betrayal of her husband? He did this! He spoiled his whole life, threw it down the drain. A woodpecker knocks a thought...

How to survive a betrayal of a husband

We propose to adapt this stress with the help of the knowledge of the training "Systemic Vector Psychology" by Yuri Burlan. There are a huge number of results in women who have managed to solve the difficult, delicate problem of a husband's betrayal. Recall that the human psyche is divided into eight completely different groups of properties, talents and desires, called vectors. They determine values, types of thinking and life scenarios. People simply do not understand each other due to the fact that everything is different for them - ways of fulfilling desires, sexuality and more.

Having understood the difference and the internal structure of oneself and a partner, it is possible to be able not only to make the right decision, but also to fulfill it in the best way for oneself and the family.

A person with the famous anal vector considers family to be the main value of life. A woman is the best mother, daughter, wife, friend. Faithful, reliable, economic and responsible. He will never betray, never leave his spouse. Divides the world into "clean - dirty". This means the value of the purity of everything: the body, apartment and relationships between people. Filth as the absence of truth hurts incredibly deeply. Well, is it possible to forgive the betrayal of her husband to such a woman - judge for yourself. The task is not easy!

One of the features of people with an anal vector is a unique memory. They remember everything - good and bad. The advice to forget, to “let go of the problem” is simply absurd for them, who remember the smallest details not just for years, but all their lives. And how to forget betrayal, if decency, fidelity, truthfulness, justice (everyone is equal!) - a beacon from childhood. When they were offended, not given enough - a sense of injustice, internal disharmony demand revenge. Revenge is a bad way to level the internal state.

Now imagine that this woman also has a visual vector. Fear of the dark since childhood, a huge amplitude of emotionality and sensitivity create in the imagination suffering inconsistent with the problem. Flies are transformed into elephants. And then - the betrayal of a loved one! The meaning of the life of a spectator is love. She shouts about it to the whole world. Passion for Shakespeare - about her. Ready to share with everyone in order to understand whether it is necessary to forgive her husband's betrayal; the opinion of the psychologist, all girlfriends, colleagues and neighbors will be listened to and bitterly mourned together.

Step Three

Nothing is lost in your life yet. Women who were able to forgive their husband's betrayal and save their families say that relationships have become stronger and full of joy and pleasure. Of course it's not

happen overnight. But having understood your own desires and properties, having seen in reality all your differences, you will learn to give your man what he lacked before. Up to advice on how to get out of stress in case of problems at work. After all, it is the woman who is tasked with maintaining peace and comfort in the family, such help will be appreciated.

Step Four

Learn the main thing that will forever bind your man with the strongest voluntary threads to you - to create an emotional connection in a couple. In short, man has not lost his animal sense of smell. Naturally, the couple meets and persists for about three years on the smells of passion pheromones. This time is necessary to give birth and grow up children a little. If during this period a woman does not create an emotional connection, the man loses interest and goes to the one that smells more desirable.

To create an emotional connection with your husband, you need to slowly open up yourself. Talk about what was important and secret in childhood. Something you couldn't tell anyone, even in secret. By acting in this way, you will provoke him to return conversations. By exposing his soul, sharing the secret, a man becomes more open to you, more free in expressing feelings next to you. In the whole world, except for you, there will not be the same person before whom he allows himself to be so frank. If you constantly work on this, then the emotional background in the family will become favorable.

A trusting atmosphere in the family is a rarity in our times. No sane person would want to change her. Problems with how to forget betrayal will no longer arise in your couple. This perspective will secure your future. The choice is yours - come to the training and listen to everything more fully and in detail. At the same time, you can listen to classes on sexuality.

“... It so happened that it was the break with my husband that brought me to the training. Now I am grateful to him, because he left, and the whole world appeared.

I came to the training terribly busy, it's hard to convey that all my thoughts were in the past for days on end. I sometimes stuck for hours in these sucking memories, in an attempt to figure it out, to analyze why everything turned out the way it did. And it was a devastating treadmill.

From the beginning of the training, I began to revive ... "

“... At the time of the first free lecture, I was “babying” with a severe resentment towards a man, from time to time she simply overwhelmed me, and the condition was terrible, but after the first lecture, the resentment went away, the “incomprehensible” actions and words of a person, what drives him, became clear, and even after Yuri’s story, on the very first day I realized that my resentment, as they say, is not worth a damn in the eyes of that man, because of whom I was so upset, worried so much ... What? So funny! In general, I laughed at myself for a long time, almost the entire first lecture - until the morning!

The second one followed. Which cemented my achievement. It's such a relief!