What do people need first? Difficult life issue. And everyone will answer it in their own way. Because we are all different, with our own beliefs and needs. If a person understands what he wants from life, a goal appears, which he will begin to achieve. Let's talk about it.

What do people need?

To understand this issue, first you need to understand what you want. To do this, you need to take paper and a pen and paint everything. If this task seems difficult, first imagine mentally the picture of life in which you would be comfortable, the environment in which you want to live until the end of your days. And then think about what kind of person you will become, how your attitude to life will change, how the world will change, and most importantly, whether it will make you happier and more successful. After this training, you will understand what you want, set goals and, solving them, move towards the main dream. After a large-scale vision of your future, it will be easy to figure out what people and you need in the first place. To start discussing the main issue, let's dive a little into the theory.

People's needs and interests

Needs are those conditions and needs that a person needs for a normal existence, to which all his activities are directed.

They are classified as follows:

1. Biological. They are what people need in the first place. This includes everything that happens at the level of biological instincts: the need for food, drink, respiration, procreation, and so on.
2. Social needs are related to communication. This is the need of a person to be in society, to play a certain social role in society, to realize oneself in it.
3. Spiritual. They are expressed in the need for a person to acquire new knowledge, to express himself in creativity. This is the need for friendship, understanding, compassion, sympathy for other people.

All needs are closely interrelated. Because the satisfaction of some comes through the realization of others. This can be clearly seen in the example of Maslow's pyramid, an American psychologist. We will return to it later.

Interests are formed from human needs. Interest is the focus of the individual on objects that are significant to him, which is due to the presence of specific needs. It is determined by the position in society of the individual, and his personal qualities, worldview, and so on.

Here it is important not to confuse interest with attraction (unconscious intention to perform any action), as well as with inclinations (predispositions to certain activities and talent (subsequent development of inclinations). Let's return to human needs according to Abraham Maslow.

Maslow's pyramid

The classification of human needs with a description of their role in life falls into a seven-level pyramid. The beginning comes from the last, seventh step. Let's consider each in more detail:

• Physiological needs are the basis. This is hunger, thirst and so on.
• Next comes the need for reliability and security, security, self-confidence, courage, courage and more.
• Fifth step. The need for love. To be loved and accepted, to love yourself, to feel your usefulness.
• The fourth stage, like the previous one, consists of social needs. Here the need for praise, recognition of success, approval, respect is sanctified.
• The third stage speaks of the need to comprehend the world around us, gain knowledge and skills.
• The second is responsible for aesthetics, splendor, neatness, order, beauty.
• Vertex. The need for self-expression and self-knowledge. It combines all the needs and desires listed below. It includes the development of abilities, finding a life path and achieving goals.

On the example of a pyramid, we can conclude what people need. The main thing is to correctly determine the goals and achieve them, choosing the right paths that do not harm yourself and others.

Is it possible to do without needs?

Of course, this is impossible. Yes, we can live without meeting social and spiritual needs. It will be very difficult. But you can't do without the physical ones. Because thanks to them we live and are healthy.

Let's think, if you do not take into account the needs of higher levels, what can happen? Try to deprive yourself of the feeling of love, not to seek sympathy, to eradicate compassion. What will your life be like? Boring, uninteresting, inactive. Moreover, it can lead to depression and psychological imbalance.

Satisfaction of our needs begins from the lowest level and, gradually moving up, we fulfill the satisfaction of the highest. The need makes you go forward, set goals and realize them. Without it, human development is unthinkable. But in order to reach the highest level, there are things that people simply need in the first place, let's talk about them.

Health

The foundation of a happy life, without which happiness and success cannot be imagined. Many dream about it, but do not take care of themselves. It is necessary to monitor the physical condition and psychological. Lead a healthy lifestyle, eat right, exercise. Improve yourself, read books, attend interesting trainings and courses. Fight laziness, which is harmful to health.

A man needs another man

Support

This is what we receive from loved ones. Why does a person need support? Let's figure this out:

1. She makes us stronger. Let's say you are a successful person who has achieved his goal. You have a big business, and everything was going well until one moment. A crisis. Everything began to collapse like a house of cards, the partners turned their backs, the cadres fled. And then the family and a loved one who have always believed in you come to the rescue. You can't give up! If you enlist strong support, wings grow behind your back, and desire and ambition will help you cope with difficulties.
2. Helps realize a dream. Let's say a child draws beautifully and wants to unlearn how to be a designer. And parents resist and force them to make a choice in favor of an economical university. The child is unhappy, follows their lead. After studying, he attends an unloved job. What if they were supportive? Everything would change, he could become a famous artist! Support works wonders. But remember: it's never too late to change everything in your life.
3. Helps to grow, develop, gives a sense of confidence.
4. Allows you to create true friendship. When you find yourself in a difficult situation and expect help from a friend who let you down, the proceeds come from where you do not expect. Situations like this help you see true friends.

You are not alone, troubles happen to everyone, look around, maybe someone needs your help.

Let's talk empathy

What does it mean to sympathize? This is the ability to understand the state of mind of another person, his experiences and be able to perceive them. And empathy means not only to listen, but also to let other people's emotions pass through oneself. Does a person need sympathy? Yes. It works wonders, helps people get closer, find new and true friends, promotes healing. Makes a person human.

We need to learn empathy, the more we begin to show sincere attention to others, the better we will understand their position towards ourselves, we will be able to change the attitude of other people towards others. Sympathy, you can not be intrusive.

• Don't forget tact.
• You should not be too annoying, but you should not remain indifferent. You can call a friend in need and offer to help.
• Never focus on the positive aspects of a shock. Especially when it comes to the loss of a loved one.

There are no common truths on how to show humanity, it must come from the heart, from the depths of the soul.

Empathy and Compassion

Do people need empathy and compassion? Of course yes. These qualities can manifest themselves throughout life. The terms have different meanings. The first is based on complete mutual understanding, a calm and attentive attitude towards another person. You can show sympathy, but not compassion at the same time.

Compassion is the skill of seeing your own anxieties in the experiences of others. Why do people need compassion and empathy? In order not to be dry and insensitive, indifferent to everything.

Do not confuse compassion and pity

Pity is not a deep feeling. Moreover, it carries destructive power. Why do people who find themselves in a difficult situation not want to be pitied? Because this emotion is based on the recognized inferiority of the object of pity, his inability to get out of trouble. It makes the other person feel like a victim of the circumstance in which he finds himself.

Compassion is a manifestation of generosity. And pity is an indicator of cowardice. If you are able to sympathize and empathize, then you have a good heart in which love lives.

What does a person need in the first place? Being human. Loving, kind, considerate, compassionate, able to empathize. And also to be loved and accepted. It's very difficult without it. It is then that there will be recognition, success, well-being and well-being.

Why do we wait for the New Year or Monday to find a new job, lose weight or learn a language, and then do nothing anyway and become more and more disappointed in ourselves. Psychologist Olga Vvedenskaya tells how to make dreams and New Year's resolutions really come true.

- Why do we wait for the new year or Monday to start a business?

Olga Vvedenskaya

- The new seems to us difficult and scary. The desire to postpone the terrible is understandable and natural. In going beyond the usual, in changing the way of life, in fact, there is nothing to do with comfort. The new may be perceived by us as unsafe, so subconsciously we try to put it off. People can generate excuses for doing nothing for years, because to realize that “I am avoiding and doing nothing for a new life” is painful enough.

We go to work on Monday and we are sure that it is always easier to start something new from Monday. But the conditional “Monday” is an illusion. And because doing something familiar and understandable is not at all like starting a new one, and because on Monday nothing starts by itself, except for a new line in the calendar.

– So what should we do to make the new life we ​​are waiting for happen?

- Often in our imagination, the longed-for new life is a holistic and vivid picture: we are already successful, rich, happy, we have learned a foreign language, lost weight, and solved health problems.

At this moment, we do not present intermediate stages, we do not suspect that at first no result will be visible. When we are in the mood to dream, these intermediate steps towards the goal, as well as the efforts associated with them, simply elude us.

A person is so arranged that he believes in bright pictures, especially if they depict what he passionately wants. The return to reality is a harsh "landing", during which the inconsistency of life with the picture seen is noticeable - it is very painful. It is the discrepancy between reality and dreams that prompts us to conclude that again nothing is working out, even if nothing has been done yet. “Nothing will work” as the click works, and we don’t even try, taking away the possibility of a new life.

Sometimes, in order for fear and tension to go away, you just need to admit that a new life is a complex and big business that makes sense to divide into stages, and most importantly, the result will never be instantaneous.

There is a saying - "Trust in God, but don't make a mistake yourself." It is not at all about the fact that you need to rely only on yourself. Personally, it reminds me of a joke in which a person is hinted at buying at least a lottery ticket if he hopes to win. Yes, help is coming. Sometimes it is sent to us from unexpected sources. But help is what they do together with you, and not for you or instead of you.

New Years is a special occasion. Is procrastination always procrastinating?

- Not always. There are situations when postponing for a while is a reasonable and healthy decision. For example, if now there are no resources for the implementation of the plan. Sometimes, to qualitatively change life, it is enough to start getting enough sleep. It seems to be a banality, but instead of such simple self-care, the minimum necessary for survival, people begin to plan global changes.

But this is precisely the most effective way to once again experience disappointment in yourself, your life and make sure that nothing good can happen to us.

Try to first put yourself in order, provide the most necessary, solve pressing problems: what to eat, where to live, how to feel better. Don't run a marathon in a cast. You will be surprised how your psychological state will change and how strength will increase.

– Are there universal ways to start doing something and change it?

– Usually there are two. Or we are forced to make a decision due to life circumstances, when there is nowhere to go. Or the desired result is so significant that we are ready to work for it, invest as much as possible and even make sacrifices. Of course, the second option is more pleasant. Trying for the sake of what you want and, if necessary, pulling the strap are purely opposite things.

To begin to change something, at least, you need to imagine why you are what you are striving for.

It is necessary to imagine it so well that it would be possible to feel a little more.

Why do I need a new job? Because it's prestigious or because I'll feel like I belong there?

Why get rid of excess weight? Because “thinness is beautiful” or do I want to feel great again? It is enough to ask yourself a couple of simple questions to figure out whether the goal is really yours or a derivative of the desire to be comfortable, accepted, socially approved.

It is easy to recognize “not your own” goal: as soon as you start moving towards it, you will feel longing and emptiness. It's like you're not living your own life. The sooner you manage to admit it, the less precious time will be lost. If the goal is your own, the probability of achieving it increases dramatically.

– How to plan and execute? Are there simple tips?

Everyone is looking for their own path. It is always an individual effort and overcoming, so there are no simple, let alone universal, tips. But there are a few things to consider:

First, deal with limiting stereotypes: “it is impossible to earn a lot of money in my profession”, “the main thing in life is to get married successfully”, “everyone in our family has poor health, me too”, “I will never achieve anything”, “they don’t like smart women” ...

Pay attention to the marker words that signal limiting beliefs to us: impossible, impossible, never, never, always. Whether these beliefs come from family or traumatic experiences, it is worth considering whether they correspond to reality and whether they are objective. Be honest with yourself. It often turns out that we get used to thinking this way, we are so sure of our limiting belief that we have never tried to check whether it is true.

Secondly, forces should be calculated. Compare what you have planned with the resources available, be it time, health, finances.

Third, make detailed step-by-step plans. The more difficult the task, the more small steps there will be. Agree, not everyone will undertake to cook a complex dish with an intricate name. However, clear instructions - wash vegetables, boil water, cut greens - no longer look so intimidating. Clear, detailed instructions reduce stress and reduce fear. The main thing is that she seems to say: “Nothing supernatural. You can all".

Fourth, make it a rule to master the art of small steps. It is they that move us towards the goal, unlike jumps, which often lead to exhaustion and disappointment.

Fifth, by taking small steps, record even a slight success. It not only supports, it also inspires. Not everyone has the habit of praising and encouraging themselves. Meanwhile, when you see the result of your own actions, it becomes more difficult to discount efforts. Seeing results is really important. Better yet, write it down.

For example, you can start a special diary, draw a scale, mark dates with signatures about what exactly has changed in your life. There is a clear and simple technique: draw a staircase on a large sheet of paper, the bottom step of which will be signed by the date you started your actions.

Each new step will mark the next step. The signature next to it is to testify to what exactly you did and what result was obtained. When you do this simple exercise, your efforts become visible and tangible. It inspires and moves forward.

Sixth, Learn to Celebrate Success. Perhaps this sounds trite. But it is precisely to reward, praise, say "thank you", pamper, encourage - simple human ways to show someone that we are satisfied, grateful and appreciate what this person has done. So why not apply it to yourself?

Finally, the last, seventh advice, on which everything often rests: be honest with yourself. Don't fool yourself. Check in with yourself as often as possible. Ask yourself questions: “Do I really need this? Do I understand why I'm doing this? Do I have the resources, or am I drawing imaginary forces from where they have long been gone? How to replenish resources that are not enough? If you need help, where can you get it?

Remember, talking to yourself is generally helpful. Both at rest and on the way to something new.

Sometimes we treat and give gifts not at all to those who are needed and close, by mistake. And we force our people to pack goodies in bags and inhale the aroma of a Christmas cake. This is wrong - your gifts are the best and in the first place! To your loved ones and those you need...

The right people are people who are needed to solve various issues. That's who the "right people" are. And these people should be properly congratulated and bestowed, so that they help resolve issues. And then there are close people, relatives. They, too, must be bestowed properly and well congratulated, as it should be. So reasoned one young woman when she went to a large city store for gifts. She also had a shop, but in the village. And she traded in building materials.

First of all, you need to take care of your necessary and close people.

It was a pity to spend money on gifts for the right people, but Natasha persuaded herself that it was necessary. So it is necessary. Yes, you have to pay loans. The shop needs to be refurbished. You have to pay taxes. And you have to pay salaries to employees: two sellers, a cleaner, a security guard Mahmulla. Although the salary is almost nothing to pay. And, probably, they steal quietly anyway. Everyone steals. Everyone is deceiving. And you have to be very strong and tenacious in order to survive, so as not to lose your shop. And you can save money - not give a bonus. Almost no profit this year. And you have to pay loans, taxes ... And again the same thoughts swirled in my head.

Natasha nevertheless forced herself to buy expensive drinks in beautiful bottles for the right people. Expensive chocolates in large elegant boxes. Christmas cupcakes, horror, how expensive. Pineapples and bananas, which Natasha herself has not eaten for a long time. Expensive. This is luxury. And cookies in a bunny tin, also awfully expensive. Sliced ​​salmon fish ... We must give it to everyone who checks, well, you know. They will be pleased and they will not check too cruelly. And you also need to give the evil mother-in-law, who curses Natasha and wishes her a fierce death. Because the mother-in-law promised to transfer her house to her son, excuse me. And in general, it is necessary to maintain good relations. And the husband's sister must be given, otherwise she will be offended and throw a tantrum. And he will begin to turn her husband against Natasha.

Natasha herself had not eaten anything like this for a very long time. You have to pay loans, taxes - again the same bagpipes. Here Natasha took large rustling packages and went to the village to her place, went to her shop. From the packages there was a strong smell of tangerines and this expensive cake ... We need to pack gifts for the right people, that's what we need to do. The salesmen, Tom and Zoya, came up and began to help. They always silently helped Natasha, for a long time. And Mahmulla began to help, to put everything together beautifully. And the cleaner Nina Ivanovna, an old woman, came up and began to admire, well, just like that. And smile. Everyone was so carried away sorting and looking at bananas, pineapples, a box of cookies, colorful bottles, as if the holiday had already begun. Everyone perked up and looked, looked...

Natasha suddenly looked at her people and said: "Set the table. We will have a holiday today!" Everyone was terribly surprised and rejoiced, waving their hands. This should be given to the right people! And Natasha looked gloomy, she was generally gloomy, - and said that they are - the right people. Close people. There is no one more needed and closer, that's the point. And the rest will somehow manage. They will buy for themselves. They have a lot of money. We will send them greeting cards. Spit. That's what Natasha said rudely. And the store was closed, they put up a "revision" sign, and then set the table. And everything was very, very good, that's how it should be, it was. It's always like that with the right people. And with loved ones. With truly loved ones...

This was all a long time ago. And Natasha now has several stores and warehouses. She never regretted the gifts she gave to the right people. close and needed. And about the prize that you nevertheless scraped together that year for your own people - you can always scrape up for your own if you want. And gifts in the first place really should be given to the right and close people. Treat them with cookies and pineapples - but first you need to understand who they are - these right people. Where are they. Because sometimes we treat and give gifts not at all to those who are needed and close, by mistake. And we force our people to pack goodies in bags and inhale the aroma of a Christmas cake. This is wrong - your gifts are the best and in the first place! To his, close and necessary ... published.

P.S. And remember, just by changing your consciousness - together we change the world! © econet