Comic birthday horoscope for guests. Weather forecast for anniversary and birthday
This fun, humorous horoscope for today according to the zodiac signs can be used every day. Open this page every morning and good mood for the whole day guaranteed in full!
And for everyone who believes in happiness, we recommend reading our happy eastern horoscope by year of birth with recommendations from astrologers and poets. All our serious and cheerful horoscopes were written specifically for the “Favorite Holiday” website. Share them with friends, put links, but respect our authors - do not reprint our horoscopes. Thank you.
Cool, fun horoscope for today for Aries
Be active and decisive.
First, try doing some exercise.
So that your work does not go in vain, remember: if people are valued by their work, then a horse is better than any person.
Cool, fun horoscope for today for Taurus
Be careful. Before you do anything, think it through.
Measure seven times and only then cut eight times.
The seventy-first time you will succeed.
The stars do not advise kissing your secretary in the presence of your wife.
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Cool, fun horoscope for today for Gemini
New things await you.
Remember: even the stupidest idea can be executed masterfully.
And don't be afraid to do what you don't know how to do.
After all, the ark was built by amateurs. Professionals built the Titanic.
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Cool, fun horoscope for today for Cancer
Life is good... hic... Repeat this, spreading red caviar on the bread in a thick layer. Or black.
But don’t rush to pour vodka.
Remember: alcohol is a time machine.
I drank and it's tomorrow.
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Cool, non-boring horoscope for today for Leo
Talk less, listen more.
It’s better to remain silent and grunt with pleasure.
Your income will be higher than your expenses. Because there will be no expenses at all.
Get a piggy bank and grunt together.
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Cool, fun horoscope for today for Virgo
You will be thrown from one extreme to another.
First, the boss will call you on the carpet and scream like a pack of crocodiles.
In five minutes, he will offer you the position that you have been seeking for a long time.
Agree!
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Cool, non-boring horoscope for today for Libra
You will be on horseback.
Everyone else will probably have to travel on foot.
You may feel out of place.
The stars advise you to break the plate, get off the horse, break the plate, get off the horse and finally exchange it... for a bicycle.
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Cool, fun horoscope for today for Scorpio
You will have a romantic date.
Enjoy, forgetting about everything in the world....
When Sveta starts getting ready to go home, pretend to be asleep.
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Cool, fun horoscope for today for Sagittarius
Your mood will jump.
From TV to cabinet, from cabinet to table.
Try to catch him anyway.
Stand somewhere in the corner and ask: “Kolis! Who are you working for?!”
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Cool, fun horoscope for today for Capricorn
Your sixth sense will not let you down. It will say: "Enough!"
The other five senses will fail.
They will say something absurd, but you will understand them.
Because after the fifth glass a Russian person is able not only to understand Chinese, but also forgive him.
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Cool, fun horoscope for today for Aquarius
Everything will be given to you with ease.
Even a visit to the dentist.
At first you will be very afraid. Then it turns out that his drill is broken.
But don’t relax and remember: if you are happy for more than one day, it means they are hiding something from you.
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Cool, fun horoscope for today for Pisces
A creative upsurge lies ahead of you.
Stock up on climbing equipment in advance.
Already stocked up?.. Then full speed ahead!
To conquer the next height!... Just don’t shout later" “Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawonsssssssss from being a chess player"
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Even those who do not believe in horoscopes know that they themselves were born, for example, under the sign of Aries, their wife is a stubborn Taurus, and their close friend is a Gemini. When wishing a happy birthday, take into account the horoscope, the birthday person will be pleased. Today we offer you comic
congratulations according to the zodiac signs.
ARIES - never guilty of anything.
Aries always runs ahead of the locomotive. They are active, dynamic and not prone to pessimism. In our active times, Aries are simply ideal! Let us raise a glass “to the furious and rebellious!” For Aries!
For a man:
Everyone knows - stubborn Aries,
All conventions are corrected,
Even if I'm guilty,
Still repeats: “I’m right!”
He is persistent, fearless,
He is in charge of the fire.
Let our fiery lamb
He will break through all the walls with his forehead!
For a woman:
Aries is a fire sign
It's hot for everyone when you're around.
Like fire, beckoning to you
You burn even with your glance.
She warmed and charmed everyone,
Giving a magical light.
We drink to make you shine
Brighter than others - up to a hundred years!
TAURUS is the smith of his own happiness.
Taurus is solid, stable, reliable. He is full of earthly charm, sensitive to the beauty of flowers, smells and nature in general. Sets up your home in the most comfortable way or summer cottage plot. At the birthday of a Taurus or Heifer, it is worth raising a toast to earthly beauty! And for the owner (hostess) - her embodiment!
For a man:
Taurus is calm and confident
His path of life is measured.
He is in life for any cause
It is handled simply and skillfully.
So let's raise a toast to Taurus -
Good luck to the blacksmith!
For a woman:
The heifer is the hostess
She always has
IN warm kitchen is being cooked
Delicious food.
There is no order,
She has comfort
The legs are just themselves
They are taking her to visit!
For my dear hostess,
For a cozy home
Let's drink one by one -
And let's pour it again!
(To be continued…)
Congratulations according to zodiac signs. Part 4
Svetlana Burtseva
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Let's drink to Sagittarius - a daring fellow.
Sagittarius are people of high spirituality, the Don Quixotes of our days. They are always ready to stand up for the truth and defend the weak. They love to help everyone and give advice. And it’s okay that advice is sometimes stupid, and help confuses the matter even more. The main thing is that Sagittarius has a pure and noble heart. With him you should always be ready to go to the ends of the earth and to crazy feats! Toast at Sagittarius's birthday: “For justice! For the height of the spirit!
To a man
Everyone knows that Sagittarius is
a fighter from birth!
He stands up boldly
the noblest thing.
Everyone loves and honors him -
He's almost like Robin Hood.
Or even William Tell -
hits the target!
Let everything be done
more than ok
let every arrow
will hit the top ten!
To a woman
Everyone knows that Strelchikha
manages her husband dashingly -
she's such a wife,
like an Amazon!
We do not discredit Strelchikha,
but we want to wish her
so that I could at least at night
hide your onions under the bed!
Capricorn - live without worries!
Capricorn is an earthy, realistic sign. He is able to climb the career ladder and gain a strong position in society. Women often become businesswomen. And if not, then they certainly occupy a strong position as the head of the house. With Capricorn you will be comfortable and safe! Toast at Capricorn's birthday: “For confidence in the future!”
To a man
So many paths in life
in front of you, Capricorn!
You are an earthly sign, and your step is firm,
you can be proud of yourself!
So be calm, like a yogi,
live without grief and anxiety!
We drink so that you are not deceived,
so that all friends are true.
May the horns never become
a gift from your wife!
To a woman
Let it be, Koerozhka,
your path is easy,
let whatever you want,
then at that very moment it comes true!
Run easily like a goat
and don't be afraid of worries,
may your life be like a rose
Blooms in the middle of winter!
Aquarius-
Pour us a stronger drink!
Aquarians are extremely fond of talking, fantasizing, and pouring out their souls. He is active: one idea is being embodied, another is on the way, a third is in stock. Intelligence is a strong trait of Aquarius. These are sophisticated aesthetes and deep thinkers. Toast at Aquarius's birthday: “To intelligence and beauty!”
To a man
Your patron, Aquarius,
looks at us from the bus.
Pour it stronger, don’t be sorry -
because there is a wonderful toast!
For giving life
us a waterfall of miracles,
so that the summer rain pours
only joy from heaven!
Let the shadow not darken
the path of your destiny,
for a summer shower on a winter day
We'll drink, Aquarius!
To a woman
My dear chatterbox,
You are pouring words like water!
We are coming to you, friend,
like without an umbrella - in the rain.
On this holiday, Aquarius,
have pity on our ears
and something stronger
pour it without hesitation!
Dreamy Pisces could do so much...
Pisces are gentle and impressionable natures. They are ready to feel sorry for everyone, to sympathize with everyone. Emotions are the main thing for Pisces. They rarely swim against the current and usually live in their own parallel world, far from everyday life. This world is full of beauty and tenderness. Do not destroy the dreams and illusions of Pisces! A toast for their name day? Of course: “For making your dreams come true!”
To a man
Happy swimming to the Fish in the river,
and in the sea, and in the lake, and in the ocean!
If you want, then in milk,
If it works out - even in nirvana!
Swim through life, swim in freedom,
let your dreams come true!
Just don't try to dive in alcohol -
Sharks and even whales drown in it.
To a woman
Dreamy Pisces
so much could.
But only reluctantly
raise their fin.
I raise my glass
and I propose a toast,
so that Rybka succeeds
suddenly become gold!
Congratulations according to zodiac signs. Part 3
Svetlana Burtseva
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Lion and lioness - king and queen
Leo is an extremely ambitious sign. The only thing he craves from the world is flattery, flattery, flattery! Leo simply basks in the rays of universal admiration. Praise him - and he will be capable of many things: he will help, and console, and save, and lend money. Have you figured it out yet? On the name day of a Leo or Lioness there can be only one toast: “To our incomparable one! Unsurpassed! The only one!
For a man:
Let everyone know - Leo
there are rights to the kingdom!
He who dares controls.
He can do it! He can do it!
I'll overcome all the difficulties,
taking over the whole world,
may he be right forever
our fire-fighting Leo!
For a woman:
luxurious purring Lioness,
you can be proud of yourself!
You were born to reign, to captivate,
both to rule and to subjugate!
So let you, my queen,
the whole world in love will submit!
Virgo is the harvest queen!
Virgo is a rational, critical, analytical sign. He values neatness and (oddly enough!) a sense of humor. Most of all, he values intelligence - and loves for this quality to be respectfully noted in him. So, a toast to Virgo’s birthday: “To a brilliant mind! For wisdom! For the critical talent that helps us all become better!” Virgos value health and a rational lifestyle. They take toasts “to health” seriously. So don’t skimp on wishes of this kind!
To a man
September and August - Virgo servants –
we are given a generous harvest,
and that means for your merits
Collect rewards generously!
Everywhere, in everything, be the first
may all people honor you.
Queen of the Harvest - Virgo
will reward you for your work!
For a woman:
Simple, confident
you are walking exactly according to fate.
Always ready to give advice,
you emit a soft light.
May our Virgin be preserved
Lord from all kinds of insults, -
will give your heart joy and peace,
will give you more than enough money.
We wish her to be healthy
and don’t forget about your friends!
Scales - amazing beauty.
Scales - charming, sexy, relaxed. They put aesthetics at the forefront; beauty is the main thing for them. Grace in everything and attractiveness to everyone is what you should emphasize in your toast. Libra is controversial. They try to weigh everything once and for all and at the same time eternally hesitate. Raise your glasses to determination and righteousness, maybe this will encourage the hero of the day to do something important for him.
To a man
You don't know fear in life,
you were able to weigh everything on Libra,
you know exactly what it costs,
you are going the right way.
We wish everything to come true,
so that it goes according to plan - like a clock,
so that you never make mistakes
Fortune is accurate Libra!
To a woman
You are made of hesitation
out of unjustified doubts,
you are all a hint and expectation,
love and happiness gentle genius.
Yes, only Libra women
such exquisite beauty!
So let's drink, angel of beauty,
May everyone's dreams come true!
Scorpio is a champion of burning passion!
Scorpio is a mystical personality. This man is torn by passions. He
he suffers and torments others. The adventurous streak in Scorpio is very strong; he loves adventure and danger. He makes concessions extremely rarely; his motto is “What’s mine is mine.” And most importantly: the Scorpio woman - femme fatale. A Scorpio man is simply irresistible in the eyes of the opposite sex. But be careful! They love to play with other people. Toast at Scorpio's birthday: “To the triumph of love!”
To a man
We hear from all sides:
“What a darling Scorpio!
He is both bright and smart,
and a champion in bed!
And - when he feels itchy -
impossible to achieve! »
Let all obstacles pass,
Let him achieve happiness!
BUT... Let your own poison
Scorpio beware!
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Geminis are inspired creators.
On the birthday of your friend Gemini, remember that the sun of Russian poetry, Alexander Sergeevich Pushkin, was also born under the sign of Gemini. Gemini is an enthusiastic, super sociable, creative person. This is an air sign. He is changeable like the wind. Have you guessed why we're raising our glasses? For creativity! Here's to change! For the unknown!
For a man:
Promises inspiration
Air sign - Gemini
These are geniuses of communication,
These are the joys of the creators!
Humanity's crown
Pushkin was also a Gemini!
If you were born a Gemini,
Don't lose face!
For a woman:
It's like there's wind in my head,
then suddenly calm and modest.
Although I see clearly, you are alone,
but sometimes it seems like there are two of you.
You change all the time
enchanting body and soul.
So be like this for many years
unpredictably beautiful!
Cancer - drinking beer is not a fool.
A native tradition combines raki with beer. This makes sense. Cancer really loves to eat and understands cooking. However this zodiac sign not at all a flat primitive creature. On the contrary!\ Cancer is ONE OF the most sensitive signs of the Zodiac! This is a dreamer. And a very touchy dreamer! Be careful not to offend his impressionable soul!
And our toast will sound like this: “To a world of dreams, harmony and beauty!” This is where the crayfish reside, rejecting harsh reality.”
For a man:
Cancer - there is no sign of a soul,
He is happy to serve his friends.
Aside from Raka beer
hard for us to imagine.
Let's raise our glass, lovingly,
and let's clink glasses in Russian
we'll invite you for a beer
not as a snack!
To a woman
One moment you laugh, and then suddenly there is silence.
That's how you attract men to you,
but at the last moment you retreat,
our shy sweet crustacean.
Today we wish with excitement,
so that you become more beautiful over the years,
so that, having given up his embarrassment,
boldly took the joys of life!
Each holiday is good and interesting in its own way. But usually at any holiday it all comes down to the fact that almost 99% of the attention is paid to the hero of the occasion: the hero of the day or the newlyweds or the birthday boy. What about the guests? They came to have fun and have fun! We haven't forgotten about them, and have prepared an interesting game block: a comic astrological forecast for guests at the anniversary. This forecast can be presented in different ways. The most obvious option is for an astrologer to come out and read out his forecast for each guest or zodiac sign. A gypsy can also come out, but here questions arise - where is the gypsy so smart that she understands astrology? Therefore, a gypsy would not be very appropriate in such a block. The third option is reading astrological forecast the presenter himself. This is in case it is not possible to make a scene with changing clothes. There may be other options, but they are not so obvious. How to display this number is up to you. Below we will provide you with several comic forecasts, which you can use for anniversaries.
Comic horoscope 1.
The first version of the comic horoscope is written by the guests themselves. Everything here is quite simple, but interesting. Everyone knows a game called missing adjectives. And in this game we will skip the names of the guests. You need to come up with a forecast that does not include names. Then, at the celebration, you ask the hero of the day to take turns calling out the names of all the guests who are present at the celebration. And enter the names into the forecast one by one. Next, read out what happened.
Example of a letter with guest names missing:
“Today (the date of the anniversary, the stars predict for us a great festive evening! It will end differently for everyone, but everyone will be happy. At 19 o’clock Jupiter will eclipse the sun and at this time (guest’s name) will go to rest under the table. Two minutes later, when the sun will emerge from under the shadow of Jupiter (guest's name) and join the vacationer under the table.
At 19.25 the moon will appear in the sky. At that very moment (guest's name) with the words - I'm going to sleep! – falls face first into a plate of salad. When the Ursa Minor appears in the sky, (guest's name) will begin to look for a warm place to rest and will find it on the large and cozy chest of (guest's name).
As soon as the clock strikes 20 o'clock, a musical break will begin. And (guest's name) will be the first to go out onto the dance floor and show a master class. After his dance (name of guest) shouting - Bravo! – will run onto the stage and arrange wild dance with elements of striptease. When (guest's name) sees this, he will scream - oh my God! This is the best thing I've seen in my life!
In twenty minutes. When the big bear appears in the sky, the dancing guests will calm down and sit down in their seats. At the same time (guest's name) will shout loudly - I demand the continuation of the banquet! - He will drink a glass of vodka and carefully lay his head on the table, as if on a pillow.
The evening will end with all the stars appearing in the sky, and under their influence (guest’s name) and (guest’s name) will sing a duet song - Mom Luda, come on, come on, come on! And the rest of the guests will film them on their phones to show the clip tomorrow morning and make fun of them!”
Here's an option you can try. You can change the text or come up with your own. It is important to remember here that all people are different, and if you know that someone might be offended, then it is better not to include their name in the forecast.
Comic forecast 2.
The following forecast is for guests the morning after the holiday. This forecast is called the hangover forecast!
So, dear guests! Just a moment of attention. Today we all go out and have fun. But none of you thinks about the consequences, doesn’t think about what will happen to each of you tomorrow morning. But our astrologer already knows everything, and will tell you what will happen to each of you tomorrow morning.
Aries - the morning will start very badly for you. Approaching the mirror, you will see that your rounded horns have straightened and are preventing you from going through the doors.
Taurus - don’t think that if you drank before the holiday activated carbon, then everything will be fine with you. You will see this coal again, and you will understand that everything is very bad.
Gemini – don’t be surprised, but in the morning you will wake up with a person who is exactly like you!
Cancers - and you will learn to quickly crawl backwards from each glass, remembering this evening and your screams - pour it, drink it!
Leos - in the morning you will make such a roar that your neighbors will each bring you bottles of cold mineral water.
Virgos – don’t go to the mirror in the morning. Otherwise, you risk not recognizing yourself and fainting out of fear.
Libra - tomorrow morning will begin with you weighing and figuring out how much a normal person can drink, and how much you drank.
Scorpio – as soon as you wake up, you will immediately have a hangover. Otherwise, you will sting everyone with your sting all day long.
Sagittarius – it’s better to leave money in advance for tomorrow. Otherwise, you will shoot them at passers-by because they have a hangover.
Capricorns - a surprise awaits you in the morning - you will have new horns.
Aquarius - in the morning you will have guests who will want to continue the banquet with you.
Pisces - and you will be ashamed of this evening and your behavior. All tomorrow you will be silent, like a fish.
Horoscope 3.
And this horoscope is the shortest in the world! But this makes it even funnier and the guests will definitely like it. And so, let's look:
Horoscope 4.
And this is a rather bold horoscope, it is erotic! But nevertheless, it’s funny and the guests will like it. So that this horoscope goes off with a bang. Do this:
- name your zodiac sign and guests under this sign come to you. Romantic music turns on, they dance, and then you read out the horoscope:
Horoscope 5.
And another horoscope - alcoholic!
The same can be done in a special way. You name the zodiac sign and the guests under that sign stand up. They pour glasses and you read out their horoscope, after which these guests drink. It turns out interesting and funny:
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Leading:
Dear guests, today an astronomer and predictor came to us, who made a forecast for next year, intended for our hero of the day, based on the stars.
Details, attributes: a white robe, a folder of books under the arm, a telescope in hand and a poster-congratulation-prediction for the coming year for the hero of the day. The prediction and poster are printed, and you don’t have to memorize the text, but simply read it from the sheet.
Astronomer:
Hello dear guests and our unrivaled hero of the day.
In the previous month, I worked on (NAME's) horoscope.
My prediction was inspired by the location of the nearby planets Mars and Venus, and the unusual cycle of our sun.
After carefully determining the degrees between the Moon and other planets solar system, according to the existing pattern, spiral cyclicity, an accurate and individual prediction has been made for our (NAME).
A busy work schedule will bring a little discord in family relationships. Virgos' behavior has not satisfied their partners for some time. Virgos are used to controlling their loved ones, constantly teaching and being jealous. On this basis, relationships will cool, which can lead to separation....
Astrologer: What, did you wait? Here I am.
Applaud, friends.
Almost delayed me
Astrology is mine.
I got up early today
I counted all the stars.
I laid them out and collected them,
Here's what I learned from them.
The corporate guy is coming here
The people celebrate the holiday.
I started my starship
Scooter-high-speed.
And I got ready for the road,
I came to your cafe.
To read the stars
Find out all your secrets.
I’ll compose it for you without hassle
Alcohol horoscope.
IN lays out the stars on the table, mixes them up, and, pulling out one star at a time, reads out the horoscope (I made large stars out of shiny paper and on each star a horoscope for each zodiac sign was printed)
loves very much Scorpion
Lots of vodka and lemon.
And then he lies unconscious,
He asks to give him Borjom!
Are there Scorpios among us?
Let them support this very hour!
(The zodiac sign about whom the astrologer read raises a glass, repeats these words and drinks, thus everyone drinks in turn).
If you are born Sagittarius,
A pourer, a daredevil,
The whole company is at risk
Fall on your face in Olivier!
Are there Sagittarius among us here?
Let them support this very hour!
We confirm all the words, we drink a glass for this!
If you don't have a brother,
No sister - no problem!
Who to make friends with, who to get drunk with
Twins will always be found!
Are there Geminis among us here?
Let them support this very hour!
We confirm all the words, we drink a glass for this!
Cancer don't back away!
He is an alcoholic magnate at heart!
And in a strange stream he took root,
Because I got lost!
Well, are there Cancers among us?
Let them support this very hour!
We confirm all the words, we drink a glass for this!
Brave like a lion, but drinks like a horse
The one who Leo was born,
And when he sleeps while passed out
I dream about myself without a mane.
Well, are there any Leos among us here?
Let them support this very hour!
We confirm all the words, we drink a glass for this!
Vodka on the right, beer on the left -
Loves neatness Virgo.
Even if this Virgo
Petya, Sasha or Eva!
Well, are there Virgos among us?
Let them support this very hour!
We confirm all the words, we drink a glass for this!
Who was born to the joy of his mother
Under the heavenly scales
He's always involved in drunkenness,
Not always balanced.
A Scales is there among us here?
Let them support this very hour!
We confirm all the words, we drink a glass for this!
This peaceful mountain goat
After drinking, stubborn
No paths, no roads
He will find his native threshold!
Capricorns are there among us?
Let them support this very hour!
We confirm all the words, we drink a glass for this!
He pours without regret!
Aquarius is a dangerous sign.
After the doses he poured
Camatosis is coming!
Aquarius are there among us?
Let them support this very hour!
We confirm all the words, we drink a glass for this!
Fish love depth
If they drink, then more than one!
After a liter, no worries
Feel like you're in a fairy tale!
Well, are there Pisces among us?
Let them support this very hour!
We confirm all the words, we drink a glass for this!
Oh, it's not true that Aries
Everyone is teetotal and calm!
After a stormy feast
They love the sound of glass!
Well, are there Aries among us?
Let them support this very hour!
We confirm all the words, we drink a glass for this!
This gentle one Taurus
Patron of all hearts.
He is sociable, big-headed,
He'll give anything for a bottle!
Are there any Taurus among us here?
Let them support this very hour!
We confirm all the words, we drink a glass for this !
